Colleagues to stay away from. How to work with a colleague if he annoys you

Good afternoon, Nat!
I noticed that your colleagues have already written a lot to you. I guess I'll just add information for thought to everything.
1. "Latent conflict", "nit-picking" - this is your perception of the situation, your interpretation of what is happening. It may be (!) About what you obviously expect from a woman for criticism and nagging.
That is, this is already about you ... About your complex, self-doubt, paranoid, etc.
In fact, a colleague may have a personality type that disposes her to pedantry, stereotyped perception of the situation, to a lack of flexibility, and the habit of "measuring by herself."
Therefore, I would advise you to take a closer look at how this lady behaves with other people. And I have a feeling that her behavior with others will not be very different from her behavior with you.
2. If you clearly understand that nagging and conflict concerns you and only you, you can consider two options:
- rejection of you for some reason (even at the psycho-physiological level);
- the desire to establish yourself at your expense (also common)
- and maybe both at the same time.
3. The next step will be to clearly define your goals. What exactly do you want?
As far as it is clear from the letter, you: do not want to be a source of conflict + you want to "settle" the situation.
That is, there are two tasks, and they are very humane.
It should be said right away that if there is a process of self-affirmation at your expense, then it will be incredibly difficult to nullify criticism, since the lady will have the task of “picking on you”. And, as you know, you can find fault with anything.
But, you, nevertheless, should not enter into any conflict with a colleague (neither open nor hidden, nor with irony, nor with hints of her shortcomings). Why? Any your remark or not very pleasant word (even a double meaning) will be perceived as an “attempt to take revenge”, which means you are “at war” ... and they will start attacking you with renewed vigor.
Ignoring will mean "inattention" and, therefore, "disrespect." First of all, it will cause anger, and the desire to prick even more. If you choose the "ignore" method, then you must tune in to the fact that it just won't happen, and first you have to endure stronger attacks than before. And only after some time, interest in you will disappear.
Ideally, I advise you to consider the "paradoxical prescription" method in dealing with your opponent. You can read more about it in the net. The point is to perform actions that are illogical for yourself and for others. For example, knowingly agree with all the comments of a colleague in your address and even criticize yourself (“yes, I really am so stupid that I don’t understand the weather outside” or “of course, everything is exactly as you say, I’m never I went to school and I don’t understand anything about it ”). Tension in your relationship will decrease, and thus you will mirror your colleague herself (which will lead to emotions of shame, awkwardness, guilt, etc.)
The method of "paraphrasing" will also work well, that is, retelling her own words to the offender only in other words. For example, "I understood you correctly, do you mean that I have a serious mental illness just because I come to work earlier?" Accurately formulated questions will confuse the interlocutor and stop "jokes" if she is not ready for an open conflict. In this case, you do not go into conflict either, but only clarify the meaning of her words. Such an attempt to move from latent to open conflict can help you a lot and "sort out the situation".
4. And the last thing.
Be critical of your colleague's personality. The behavior you described does not happen to happy women, confident and self-sufficient. It can be assumed that the mentioned woman has many personal internal problems, she is unhappy, notorious, she thinks stereotyped ... Think about this information. Perhaps overestimating the personality will cause a different perception of the situation, and you can form condescension towards such a problematic person.

Good afternoon. I was interested in your answer "Good afternoon, Nat! I noticed that your colleagues have already written a lot of things for you. I guess I just d ..." to the question http: // www .. Can I discuss this answer with you?

Discuss with an expert

There will always be such individuals who, without a twinge of conscience, will show aggression and obvious antipathy towards you. Mostly ill-wishers and envious people surround you in the workplace, because everyone there fights for a place in the sun and for the favor of the authorities. However, an open confrontation is less dangerous and fraught with consequences than a latent threat. Surely you, too, may have colleagues who despise you, but at the same time remain with a diplomatic expression on their faces.

Why hide hatred?

Hiding true feelings in the workplace helps workers in behind-the-scenes intrigue. In a large team environment, people will never openly show hostility to someone. They are simply afraid of incurring problems or jeopardizing their own careers. However, surreptitiously, such people are ways to bring a lot of trouble to the object of their dislike. They love to do mean things, while remaining with a spotless reputation, manipulate other people and have conversations behind your back.

"Knowledgeable means armed"

If you do not want to be part of corporate intrigue, there are some signs that the person has latent hatred towards you. Advice from psychologists: even if you figure out the ill-wisher, remain loyal to him. Don't avoid this person and be aware of the benefit of the doubt. If you are sure that there are no envious people in the office, try to be sensitive to the needs of all your colleagues, be optimistic, affable and friendly.

Strong connections with coworkers will come in handy in the future. Healthy and strong relationships in the workplace, a relaxed, friendly atmosphere help all team members to be more efficient and productive.

Healthy team relationships vs. behind-the-scenes games

Business speaker Michael Kerr says this: When all colleagues treat each other equally well, things become much easier. Each of the team members feels that there is a shoulder nearby, on which, if something happens, you can lean on. In any case, in a team with healthy relationships, it is easier to ask for favors or favors from colleagues. Moreover, people themselves will begin to offer you a helping hand. We have now described the ideal model of team relationships. What to do if your workplace far from ideal, or do you suspect that something is amiss? Before you 19 clear signs that your coworker secretly hates you.

1. Your intuition speaks about it

Perhaps this is just an obsession. However, more often than not, intuition does not let us down. If you think that someone has a dislike for you, this may very well be true. In any case, the person may treat you in a completely different way from the way he treats other team members. And it makes you think about a lot.

2. He does not smile in your presence.

We're not talking about a bad day or a sudden change in mood right now. If your coworker does not systematically or consciously smile in your presence, then something is wrong.

3. He cannot maintain eye contact with you.

Psychologists say: it is difficult to look someone in the eye if you do not have warm feelings for the person or, at least, respect. Have you noticed that a coworker avoids eye contact with you during a conversation? They are simply afraid to show hostility towards you in their gaze. Such people take the path of least resistance: they turn away or avoid you.

4. A coworker avoids you

Sometimes strange situations happen. You enter the elevator and notice a colleague walking behind. You are waiting for him, but he prefers to climb the stairs. He avoids you.

5. He spreads rumors

This unprofessional behavior is unfortunately not uncommon in the workplace. A person only loves to spread rumors about who he really does not like.

6. He doesn't notice your presence.

When you come to the office, this person will never tell you “ Good morning". He will not even stoop to the usual, meaningless phrases. This ignorance can also be evidence of his dislike.

7. The person is too dry when answering questions

Of course, he will not be able to ignore your questions. This is not allowed by corporate ethics. Ask such a person "How are you", and in response you will hear a short "Normal". If you receive business correspondence from such a person, be sure it does not start with a greeting.

8. He sends non-verbal negative signals

Such a person, at the sight of you, may involuntarily look away or grimace in a grin and roll his eyes. He is constantly closed to you: his arms are intertwined, and his legs are crossed. Also, your colleague may deliberately not take his eyes off the monitor at the moment when you enter the office.

9. He never invites you to social events.

You will never receive an invitation to a business lunch or a corporate meeting from such a person.

10. A colleague has a habit of communicating via email

Even if you are in the same room, it will be an unaffordable luxury for him to approach you with a request. He will simply send you a letter to email... Have you noticed a bias in communication towards digital format? This is a sure sign.

11. He constantly disagrees with you.

All your ideas are perceived with hostility. Very often, such a person may not allow you to finish your phrases. He interrupts you and has his own point of view on everything. Even if he understands what you suggested great idea, he will never deviate from his principles. His dislike is too strong.

12. Such a person is not interested in your personal life.

Your coworker may chat lightly during a break with other coworkers about personal life, family, and children. Only in conversations with you, he never raises these topics. He simply does not care about your personal life.

13. You are not among the companions for casual communication and jokes.

This person can amuse other colleagues for hours with casual jokes and anecdotes. Only a friendly laugh is always heard behind your back. You do not belong to the circle of the privileged few. He just doesn't feel comfortable around you.

14. He steals your ideas.

Seeing a competitor in you, such a person will try to draw attention to his own person. Therefore, at every opportunity he will use your ideas and pass them off as his own.

15. He takes over unauthorized authority

Such an employee can give himself powers that do not exist. For some reason he decided that he could give you orders.

16. He creates gangs

You may feel like you're in one of the Mean Girls scenes. You will never be part of one of the office groupings.

17. You Can't Trust Him

You share information with your colleagues for review, but this person can always use the received data against you.

18. His favorite method of interaction is defensiveness.

You feel like a deep wall of mistrust is growing between you and this person. Or your colleague is only concerned with building defensive redoubts around him. Not otherwise, he prepared for the Cold War.

19. Your work is not a priority for him.

Another big sign that says your coworker doesn't like you. Your worries and problems will never be at the top of his list of priorities. He will never treat your work with the same level of urgency as other colleagues.

All adults spend most of their time at work, then the father-in-law in the team. Often, our workplace becomes our home, and we often have to communicate with employees and colleagues much more often than even with the closest family members. It is clear that in view of such constant and long-term personal interaction, the possibility of a wide variety of conflict situations that can really turn life into a real nightmare is not at all excluded. Yes, and your favorite work, to which you gave yourself without reserve, may no longer bring that joy at all, a quarrel can overshadow even the joy of serious successes and achievements. Conflicts at work are quite frequent, therefore it is worth figuring out how to behave in order to prevent this, and if the problem could not be avoided, how to get out of it with honor, and keep the good friendly relations with employees.

Path of Least Resistance: relationships with work colleagues are different

Conflict situations in the workplace, according to official statistics, occur quite often, and it so happens that it is hardly possible to stop the cause of the conflict, as well as, as is clear, its consequences immediately. All people in the world are different and it is not at all surprising that the reaction to communication with some is fundamentally different from the reaction to others. Kind and friendly relations with colleagues are a delicate and unreliable path that you need to learn in order to make your life and work as comfortable and enjoyable as possible.

Need to know

Renowned psychologists with world names are still inclined to think that the ability to get along well with people is a special gift that you can develop on your own, and your future career, and, consequently, fate as well, may well depend on this.

However, many people think that relationships at work with colleagues should be built in such a way as to avoid any tense topics, and skillfully maneuver between icebergs of human misunderstanding, or even worse, but this opinion is erroneous. The thing is that sometimes clarification of relations, and maybe even working moments, simply requires a conflict, and avoiding it is not at all a way out of a difficult situation. It is extremely important to be able to distinguish the situation when it is worth getting away from a quarrel, and when it is possible and even necessary to enter into a confrontation with colleagues and colleagues.

This is the whole solution to the problem, and it is worth understanding that your attitude towards a person should be clearly delineated and determine whether it is destructive or constructive. If you are angry about the wrong hair color, nationality, age, nose length or foot size, then it is worth realizing that your claims are not based on any real basis.

At work, you are not required to communicate with anyone, for any reason other than work issues, so this is just the first thing to understand for yourself. You definitely don’t owe anything to anyone, but your colleagues have exactly the same rights so that you don’t dictate your own opinion, worldview, and indeed, they don’t have to smile at you either. Particularly detrimental effects of fights can lead to conflict at work between women. , after all, no one expects serious problems from them, and it is much more difficult to reconcile angry women than men.

First things first: how to avoid conflict at work with colleagues

Physicians can confirm that it is much easier to take preventive measures and prevent illness than to treat it later, and the psychology of relationships in a team is also a branch of medicine. Therefore, the optimal solution for any person will be such a model of behavior at work, when conflicts can be avoided as much as possible. Moreover, there is nothing overly complicated in this at all, so let's figure out how to avoid conflicts at work and make our life much easier and more enjoyable.

• It is worth making sure that the work really pleases you, brings joy and satisfaction. Quite often, quarrels and swearing arise exactly where people are simply busy with their own business, they may not be satisfied with the lack of career growth, unsatisfactory wage, etc. Therefore, even at the stage of employment, you need to find out all the details, and besides, it will not hurt to get to know your future colleagues.
• You should never think that the only correct point of view is your own. Even if you are definitely a highly professional specialist, and you know exactly what is what, be prepared to listen to various points of view, perhaps there will be a rational grain in them, worthy of undoubted attention. This is especially true when the opinion of colleagues is fundamentally different from yours. If at work there is a conflict with a colleague on professional issues, then it can be perceived as a work dispute and a search optimal solutions, no more.
• It is imperative that you thoroughly understand the range of your responsibilities that are dictated to you job description... True, it is not at all excluded that you will have to help someone in something, or carry out the personal directives of the boss, but they will never allow themselves to sit on their head.
• When demanding something from people, do not forget that you yourself must correspond to your own high criteria... That is, at no time should problems with a colleague at work be solved with rudeness, rudeness, nit-picking, and so on.
• There is one more rule, which we voiced the last here, but it is very important, therefore it cannot be overlooked. Gossip, slander, and behind-the-scenes talk are exactly what you should never take part in. Immediately put in place everyone who is trying to unsettle you by telling tales about colleagues, and then this problem will be removed by itself, or rather, it simply will not arise.

What to do, if there is a conflict with a colleague at work: conspiracy or paranoia

It is clear that it also happens that conflict and tense situations simply cannot be avoided, and sometimes we simply look for help even when the quarrel is ripe and is about to crack or grow to the scale of a thermonuclear attack. To understand how to get out of a conflict at work in such a situation, it is worth thinking ten times, because it is very easy to spoil everything, and it is not at all known whether it will be possible to restore something later. Often, the conflict ends with simple alienation and the reduction of communication to the solution of purely business issues, and this is the most optimal way out. But in the most serious situations, you may begin to be rude and even substitute, and then you will definitely have to do something to get out of the problem with honor.

1. Never and under any circumstances, problems with colleagues at work cannot be solved by swearing, shouting and rudeness in response to such behavior. You should not get involved in a quarrel, yell and wave your arms. A cold and detached answer will be enough, and you will not lose face, and your abuser will most likely be puzzled, because all his behavior is aimed at causing you an emotional outburst.

• If an outright quarrel in public could not be avoided, then it is strictly not recommended to "suck" the details after the fact with colleagues. You do not need this long washing of the bones, since it will not benefit anyone at all.
• Don't be afraid to talk about the current situation with direct leadership. However, this is a way out of the most difficult conflicts, when you are openly set up, bullied, and so on.

Worth remembering

For those who work in large companies, you need to know that specifically to resolve conflicts in the team, there is a special service called compliance. Just find out if there is something similar at your work and feel free to contact there.

Lessons from professionals: how to survive in a team and stay yourself

However, it also happens that conflict situations can arise not only with colleagues. It is much more difficult to understand how to resolve a conflict at work if your opponent is also a boss or a direct manager. The situation is aggravated by the fact that your personal career, professional growth, and so on may depend on this person. First of all, you should understand that you cannot shout back, throw accusations in the face and swear.

Silently listen to the tirade to the end, and then quietly leave, closing the door behind you. Left alone, it is worth pondering whether the leader's accusations are so groundless? Maybe you really should reconsider your own attitude towards work? Before figuring out how to resolve a conflict at work with your boss, you need to think ten times who is right and who is wrong. Signs of a constructive conflict will not be difficult to distinguish, yet what goes beyond the scope is already nit-picking.

• Only your professional activity can be discussed, and not appearance, moral character, marital status, nationality and so on.
• If you have repeatedly received comments on the same subject, then there is a rational grain in this, isn't it?
• The rest of my colleagues often express dissatisfaction with your work, skills, and actions.
• The boss prefers to scold and scold for misconduct in a closed office, and not in front of all colleagues.
• The leader openly points out that your actions or decisions and actions negatively affect the activities of the entire company or enterprise.

How to resolve conflict at work with direct leadership

If, upon closer examination and analysis of the situation with your superiors, you realized that by by and large, nevertheless, there is at least a share of the blame on you, so you should think about how to correct your own mistakes as soon as possible. However, it happens that the director simply does not like you, and he begins to find fault. Then it will be very difficult to get out safe and sound, of course, figuratively speaking, and it will be very difficult to get by with a little blood. How to understand that you are being "persecuted" deliberately and not deservedly?

• Permanent destructive criticism not only your activities in professionally but also personal qualities, appearance, nationality, age, gender, and so on.
• You regularly hear reproaches and reproaches, and on the most insignificant, and indeed not related to work issues.
• If the leader raises his voice, not at all embarrassed by the presence of other colleagues.
• When you ask to point out errors, but you never get specific wording.

It can be unbearably difficult to get out of such a situation with honor, and it may well happen that you simply have to go in search new job... This option cannot be discounted, but endless nagging and undeserved accusations for the sake of a decent salary are not worth enduring, otherwise life can turn into a real hell, and this is not an option at all.

Never yell in response, your aggression will cause a response explosion of emotions, even more powerful and destructive. Finally, I would like to repeat the words of one famous cartoon character, who believed that the most important thing is calmness, and only calmness! Never lose face, this is important as for your- relationship at work, and for their own psychological, and mental, coupled with it, health.

A successful career depends not only on certain knowledge and work experience, but also on the ability to build relationships in the workplace. Unfortunately, our colleagues are not always nice, smiling people who are ready to help at the first call. Literally in every office there are employees with whom it will be difficult to get along even for the king of phlegmatic people.

How to avoid conflict situations and should you avoid them? What if a person is trying to shift the responsibility for all failures to a colleague by hook or by crook? How to respond to flat jokes in your address?

Aggressors

People who are organizers of office conflicts are, as a rule, unbalanced personalities with psychological or emotional problems. Cope with such employees is not easy, but it is possible. If the team employs a person who permanently criticizes colleagues for no real reason, constantly throwing threats, demonstrating inappropriate behavior, one should not respond with aggression to aggression and threat to threat. After all, this will not give a lasting result - at best, it will have a temporary effect on the rude person.

Most the right decision there will be a “heart-to-heart talk” with the aim of clarifying the reasons for the negative attitude towards colleagues. As for the criticism of aggressive behavior, it must be constructive. If a person denies anything, he must offer an alternative in response. In this case, you can talk with the employee about the possibility of building a different, positive, model of behavior. If he does not want to make concessions and change, he will have to reduce all contacts with him to a minimum, and deal with business issues in writing. In no case should such an employee be boycotted or, moreover, harass him. In this case, you will not only become like a boor, but also damage your own reputation, which sooner or later will negatively affect your own development in the company.

Deceivers

Failure to keep promises is another scourge of the workflow. The most common example is that an employee promised to provide information by a certain date, but did not. Such behavior entails a decrease in the efficiency of the work of another employee and, as a result, the effectiveness of the company as a whole.

There can be a lot of reasons for not fulfilling promises - both banal carelessness and disorganization of a person, and a conscious plan for the survival of other employees as proof of personal superiority. In any case, it is possible and necessary to fight deception and put such a colleague in his place. First of all, define the framework for cooperation. At the first stage, it can be an agreement on specific deadlines for the provision of information in writing. It is very important that promises are not made orally, since the written form is not only proof that an agreement has been entered into, but also fixes the timing and quality of its implementation. If a person breaks a written document, it is worth taking action, for example, showing this data to the manager during his own report on the work.

There are frequent cases when a person deliberately twists information. It is important to prevent a repetition of such a situation and, having informed the deceiver that his behavior may entail certain consequences, reserve the right to report this to the manager. If the employee continues like this, they need to keep their promise. You should not be afraid of subsequent claims and accusations of slanderousness, because you honestly warned the person about your intention.

Chatterboxes

If your colleague is a chatterbox, if everyone is tired to death of his long and boring monologues, if not a single problem remains in the radius of defeat that has not been "sucked" to the very last detail, it’s time to say it out loud.

The employee may not even suspect that his chatter is not to someone's taste. But it is better to report this not in the form of claims, but in a more "sparing" mode. For example, say that you value him as an interlocutor and his opinion is very important to you, but in this moment do not have the opportunity to listen to it, because you are working. In any case, you do not have to listen to the person, if it does not apply to work, and even more so if you do not want to. This is your completely legal right, and no one can violate it. Be calm with the talkers, but don't let anyone else take on other people's problems or get in the way of your own work.

Wits

Fortunately, there are usually much fewer cynical witches in the office than talkers, but, nevertheless, even one such "joker" can poison more than one working day. His favorite tricks are contempt and disdain, and in the ability to find weak spots his colleagues have no equal! He easily gropes for the most painful topic and makes caustic remarks and flat jokes on this matter.

If you hear an unpleasant joke or rudeness in your address, you should immediately react. Moreover, this must be done confidently and calmly. Tell the interlocutor that you do not want to hear something like this in your address. It is important to talk about yourself - from the position of "I am offended", "I am annoyed", and not "you offended me", "your words angered me." The message "you" can provoke even more conflict, as the interlocutor will be offended by the accusations. This technique works especially well if you were offended in the presence of a group, and you responded under the same conditions. The interlocutor will inevitably feel the disapproval of strangers, willingly or unwillingly sympathizing with the "offended".

"The navels of the earth"

We have to deal with people of this type quite often. An all-powerful boss who is “always right,” a fastidious client who never knows exactly what he wants, a colleague who thinks that only he was underestimated at work, and everyone else in the office pays even these pitiful pennies in vain. All of them are confident in their exclusivity, require an appropriate attitude towards themselves and like to "give a star" from time to time.

There is only one way out - to put the "star" in place. All the more so that special courage for this, most likely, will not be required: far from all the “navels of the earth” are actually worthy opponents. Rather, on the contrary ...

In such a situation, it is worth reminding a person that regardless of their position in society, level of income, amount of knowledge and skills, each person is worthy of respect. No one has the right to consider another “lower than himself” and, accordingly, treat people worse than himself. The main thing is not just to say it, but to be sure that it is. The interlocutor will feel your confidence and slow down.

War and Peace

Of course, each person has certain disadvantages. And he doesn't have to change just to meet the expectations of those around him. But what if he touches the personal boundaries of another? What to do: take part in a scandal provoked by a colleague or try to distance yourself from the "conflict zone"? Options are possible ...

An employee who does this is most likely a person with a low level of responsibility, unable to effectively cope with the work assigned to him. He is a problem and a source of trouble not only for the “closest” colleagues, but for the entire company. You shouldn't put up with such a situation. If the person has no desire to change, it is best to find a replacement. Moreover, during a crisis it is not difficult.

At any conflict situation it should be remembered that an attempt to find out the reasons for hostility is much more effective than reciprocal rudeness and an aggressive showdown. Diplomacy and tact will never go out of style. Therefore, a temporary "glory" awaits the aggressor employee, while a person who knows how to compromise and peacefully solve the problems that have arisen will create an appropriate reputation for himself for many years.

It is better to fight not “against”, but “for”. For example, for freedom and independence, for Better conditions, for justice and worthy remuneration of labor, and so on. If we talk about a career, then obstacles often arise in the form of all sorts of intrigues of colleagues - both intentional and unintentional. There is resistance in any struggle. You need to be ready for this as an inevitable fact and set yourself up to overcome obstacles. And here everyone is free to choose what suits him best. If you want to fight for your place in the sun - hold the flag! If attacks and other manifestations of colleagues do not really interfere with personal goals and tasks, step aside - let them frolic for health. Well, if it's easier to give in, “do as asked,” “swallow the pill,” “turn the other cheek” - this is also your choice.

The main thing is to remember that there is always a choice. Maybe not always the most convenient and pleasant, but everyone has the right to make it.

Is it trite? But it is effective.

Some people are annoyed by the excessive emotionality of their colleagues or, conversely, lethargy, detachment from the team, or excessive friendliness and importunity. In this case, you need to somehow find mutual language with everyone if you don't want to go crazy.

Put yourself in your place annoying colleague... Surely he has reasons for this behavior. Perhaps having a lunch or dinner together will help you better understand the person. Try to get closer, to understand why he is behaving so strangely. As you get to know your colleague better, you will gradually stop noticing his shortcomings.

Look for the positive

There are positive aspects in any situation. Does a colleague constantly crawl in a chair, speaks loudly on the phone, use too fragrant perfume? But because of him, you have already replaced the old office chairs to new ones (they broke too often), the boss rarely comes to you (he is also annoyed by a loud voice), mosquitoes do not fly into your office.

In addition, communicating with those who annoy you, you temper your character, you get new experience, strengthen your nerves and learn to ignore the little things. This will help you focus more on work and not be distracted by interference.

Set the rules

It is better to discuss the problem than to hush up. Do not hesitate and do not be afraid of offending someone - speak directly about what you do not like.

• If the source of your annoyance is constantly chewing on something in the workplace, agree to eat only for lunch or only in the kitchen.
• If you find it annoying that your coworker asks too many questions or just loves to chat, agree to take a few 15-minute breaks from work when you can discuss the sensitive issue.
• For those who are annoyed by violators of personal space (they just come and sit right next to you, look at your monitor, touch your personal belongings), we advise you not to be afraid to voice that it is unpleasant for you and that it is better not to do this.

Use the mirror method

If, for example, you are annoyed by a colleague who constantly criticizes your work, start playing on his own field. Wait for him to make a mistake and do not miss the opportunity to criticize. Nobody likes to be noticed. So, most likely, he will back down.

This advice is also suitable for dealing with those who constantly discuss someone, spread rumors and gossip, do not miss the opportunity to rejoice in other people's troubles. As soon as they feel what it is like, they will immediately calm down. Of course, making friends with them will not help you, but such people will understand that you must be reckoned with. As a result, you will work together and stop wasting time on unproductive relationships.