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What does the handshake say? Different types of handshakes and their meaning. All the most interesting in one magazine

We will tell you about the eight most unpleasant and repulsive handshakes in the world. Try to avoid them like fire.
1. "DEAD FISH"
Authority Rating: 1/10
Not a single greeting causes such unpleasant feelings as a "dead fish", especially if the interlocutor's hand turns out to be cold and sticky. Shaking a soft, sluggish palm is unpleasant for almost everyone. Most people associate such a handshake with a weakness of character - after all, the interlocutor's hand is so easily transferred to a subordinate position. However, cultural differences should also be taken into account here - in some Asian and African countries, a sluggish handshake is considered the norm, and a firm handshake is considered an insult. In addition, every twentieth inhabitant of the Earth suffers from a disease called hyperhidrosis. This is a hereditary disease accompanied by increased sweating. Such people should always have a handkerchief or napkin with them in order to have time to wipe their hands before shaking hands.
There are more sweat glands on the palms than on any other part of the body, so sweaty palms are very difficult to hide. It is surprising that many of those whose handshake can be called "dead fish" are not aware of this. Ask your friends what they can say about your handshake to avoid awkwardness in upcoming business meetings.

2. TOO SOLID HANDSHAKING
Authority Rating: 4/10
Businessmen often sin like this. Too strong handshake betrays the desire for dominance and immediate control in the relationship. The hand is extended palm down, followed by a few vigorous shakes. At the same time, the interlocutor's hand is compressed with such force that blood circulation in the hand stops. Sometimes people who feel weak and are afraid to fall under the control of interlocutors shake hands like this.
3. Bonebreaker
Authority Rating: 0/10
Very close to a too firm handshake is the "bone-breaker" handshake. Such a technique can scare you to death and is never forgotten. However, he makes a proper impression only on the initiator himself. The bone-breaking handshake is characteristic of overly aggressive people who, without warning, use their advantage in physical strength and try to demoralize the interlocutor by turning his fingers into mush. Women should not wear rings on their right hand, because among business partners there can always be such a boner, and then you will have to conduct a business meeting in a state of shock.

Unfortunately, it is impossible to resist such a handshake. If it seems to you that a person is doing this on purpose, you can draw the attention of others to his act by declaring: “Oh! You hurt me. Your handshake is too strong!” Thus, you will make it clear to the initiator that such behavior is unacceptable.

4. FINGERSHAKING
Authority Rating: 2/10
This handshake is most common when greeting a woman and a man. One of the interlocutors already removes his hand, and the second has no choice but to shake only the tips of his fingers. Although the initiator may treat the interlocutor quite warmly, at the same time he lacks self-confidence. In such circumstances, the main purpose of shaking the fingertips is to keep the interlocutor at a comfortable distance. Fingertip shaking is often due to differences in the definition of personal space. This can happen if the personal space of one person is 60 cm, and the other is 90 cm. Naturally, the second interlocutor prefers to keep a greater distance, and the hands during the greeting cannot connect in the right way.

If this happens to you, take right hand the interlocutor with your left hand, and shake it properly with your right. At the same time, with a smile, say: “Let's try again!” The handshake should be equal, it will increase your authority. The interlocutor will understand that you recognize his significance.

5. PUSH WITH A STRAIGHT HAND
Authority Rating: 3/10
Like a push with the palm down, a push with a straight hand indicates the aggressiveness of the interlocutor. The main purpose of such a handshake is to keep the interlocutor at a distance, not allowing them into their personal space. Such a handshake is often encountered in rural areas, since in nature a person’s personal space expands, and he is ready to defend his territory.

In such a situation, people may even lean forward and balance on one leg just to maintain a comfortable distance for themselves.

6. PULL
Authority Rating: 3/10
In power games, another type of handshake is often used, from which tears appear in the eyes, and in extreme cases, the case can end in a rupture of the ligaments. The initiator of the handshake strongly squeezes the outstretched palm of the interlocutor, at the same time making a sharp jerk towards himself, trying to draw the other person into his own territory. As a result, the interlocutor may lose balance, and the relationship will be hopelessly damaged.

Drawing the interlocutor into the territory of the initiator can serve three purposes. First, it is possible that the initiator feels confident only within the personal space. Secondly, the initiator may come from a culture where personal space is very limited. Thirdly, he may strive to establish complete control over the interlocutor, depriving him of balance. In any case, he tends to carry on the conversation on his own terms.

7. PUMP HANDLE
Authority Rating: 4/10
The initiator of the handshake grabs the interlocutor's hand and begins to vigorously and rhythmically shake it in a vertical direction. In such a situation, no more than seven shakes are permissible, however, the initiator of such a handshake may lose control of himself and continue to shake the interlocutor's hand, as if pumping water from a pump.

Sometimes the initiator of the handshake stops shaking the interlocutor's hand, but does not release it, so that he does not inadvertently run away. The interesting thing is that only a few try to break free. Physical contact weakens the willingness to end the conversation.

8. Dutch Handshake
Authority Rating: 2/10
A similar handshake originated in the Netherlands, where it was compared to a bunch of carrots. In some ways, it resembles a “dead fish”, but is somewhat stronger and not so sticky.
Today in Holland, such a handshake is called a "dirty towel." We believe that other explanations are unnecessary.

» Handshake, meaning

What does the handshake say? Different types handshakes and their meaning

The handshake is essential element non-verbal communication. It is the key that opens or closes the door, if you give it the necessary and sufficient attention.

Another handshake is a magical test that allows you to quickly and with high certainty find out whether the conversation will end in a positive result easily and naturally or you will have to sweat a lot to get the expected result. Knowing that a too quick handshake portends a fruitless conversation can be very helpful. It will be equally useful to always remember that an exaggerated handshake indicates that you are a very welcome guest.

An elusive, sluggish, firm, short, average, or never-ending handshake - they all say quite a lot about the person you're dealing with. By carefully listening to the sensations of a handshake, you can understand a lot about the interlocutor, avoid wasting valuable time in fruitless negotiations.

What does a handshake mean?

When you meet someone, the first thing you notice is how they extend their hand.

When shaking hands, your interlocutor holds his hand at a right angle, pressing his elbow to his body.

Such a gesture belongs to a subject who has nothing to offer you but his own time. You owe him just because he agreed to accept you. Unless you have an urgent need to convince or seduce this person, cut the time of the visit to a minimum, as you will not receive any benefit. Your interlocutor is unavailable, closed and very prudent.

The hand of your interlocutor remains glued to the body.

This forces you to reach out to shake his hand. In this case, you find yourself face to face with a character who values ​​their privileges and is not inclined to show sympathy the first time.

Your interlocutor extends his hand far away for a handshake.

Most likely, he needs your support, which is why he stretches out his hand - so that you come to the rescue. He becomes fully accessible and will inevitably become disposed and spontaneous. This handshake signifies a friendly welcome.

Your interlocutor without restraint holds out his hand in your direction.

Being an extrovert, he just helps you settle in quickly. He will agree to buy your product or service if you can make an argument AT THE RIGHT moment.

When shaking hands, the interlocutor extends only the tips of his fingers to you.

Such a handshake betrays a fugitive who is responsible for something only in words. It's annoying that later such a person can put on a friendly look, because of which you simply forget about how he faked at the very beginning.

So, the aforementioned handshake is a real confession in feigning or withholding. Your interlocutor pretends to receive you, will pretend to listen to you and promise you to think about it, pretending to see you off. All make-believe, including you!

With a broad smile, the interlocutor holds out his left hand for a handshake, although he is definitely not left-handed.

Even if his right hand is occupied, such a greeting, accompanied by a hypocritical smile, is pure water expression of antipathy. In fencing, at the end of a duel, opponents who do not respect each other shake hands with their left hands. A provocateur, gossip or manipulator will always do it in such a way as to pinch you in the door and get everything out of you. He will repeat lies in order to find out the truth, betray everyone and everything (make no mistake, you too) and meaningfully pretend that some divine revelations are available to him.

If you have the discernment to anticipate this gesture, we strongly recommend that you do not shake hands with him. At least it will make him respect you. The next time you meet him, give up his left hand if he does not find it possible to extend his right. If, in spite of everything, you will be forced to respond to such a handshake, tie a knot in a handkerchief. This knot will remind you of what awaits you if you contact this person.

The interlocutor with a smile shakes your hands and forearms with both hands.

If your interlocutor shakes your hands and forearms with both hands, you are trapped. He owns the initiative and neutralizes all your defensive and offensive mechanisms from the very beginning of the game. Such a handshake can also indicate that both heroes are in a difficult situation and need each other. This kind of handshake betrays a predator.

The interlocutor shakes your hand, folding his in the form of a duck's beak.

Another handshake that tells you that you are not particularly welcome, or that the other person does not respect you very much. This type full of contempt does not even consider it necessary to hide his attitude. He uses this simple manipulation to force you to open the cards. If you're lucky, you might be able to see how his behavior towards you changes. He will not even deny himself the pleasure of justifying the coldness at the beginning of the conversation with some kind of misunderstanding. Hypocritical and vicious, he will quickly pluck you like a chicken if you give him the opportunity.

Most often, you can observe a medium handshake with a bent arm. The arm is bent at a right or obtuse angle, the handshake is vigorous, but without excess. Your interlocutor is generally constructive, but wants to learn more and get to know you better. A priori, he is moderately open, but everything will change if you manage to arouse his interest. A bent hand seems less friendly than a long handshake. Be as careful as possible if you meet with an interlocutor for work, no matter employment or cooperation. A long handshake will be the exception, a medium handshake will be the norm, and as for the short handshake, it belongs to people who are powerful or pretending to be so.

The meaning of the hand when shaking hands

Now consider the location of the hand when shaking hands. Most often, the interlocutor's hand is located vertically and parallel to yours.

  • horizontal palm facing up (arch support);
  • horizontal palm facing down (pronator);
  • vertical palm.

Most handshakes occur in the latter way, but it also happens that when meeting, a handshake is involved in the championship game.

The subject extending his hand palm down is subordinate, upward is dominant. The hand turned up has more handshakes at its disposal than the hand turned down. By observing the position of the hands during a handshake, you can instantly determine the mutual hierarchical position of the greeters. The person who extends his hand palm down is under the direct influence of the one whose hand is turned palm up.

What then is a vertical handshake? Neither dominant nor subordinate, but equal. From the very beginning, your interlocutor wants to be equal with you.

It also happens when, when shaking hands, the hands meet, but the palms do not touch. Although your interlocutor greets you with a wide smile and vigorously extends his hand, there is no exchange of energy in such a handshake. The palms are separated from each other. You will not pay attention to the manner of shaking hands if your thoughts are occupied with something else, such as an upcoming conversation. Meanwhile air bag clearly indicates that your palm and the palm of the interlocutor avoid each other. There is no sympathy in the meeting menu.

The repulsion often comes from the one who holds out his hand turned inward, palm down. Those who turn palm down give up the initiative from the very beginning of the game, while those who turn up try to impose their superiority at the same time. You are an unexpected guest. And if at the end of the meeting such a handshake is repeated again, then you will receive confirmation of your first observation.

handshake distance

Separating you from the interlocutor shaking hands, the distance is as (if not more) important, as well as the manner of shaking hands. It is a reliable indicator of the level of location of your counterpart. We strive to stay close to people who are close and sympathetic to us, and away from unsympathetic people. Comfortable interpersonal distance with loved ones and friends - down to a minimum, with colleagues - somewhere around 0.5-1 m. It is better to stay even further with your boss.

A sharp reduction in the distance during a handshake can lead to a loss of orientation in the semantic structure of the conversation. Interlocutors become somehow uncomfortable. By the reaction of the interlocutor, you can see that you are violating the distance. If you invaded her/his personal space while shaking hands, he will feel uncomfortable and will try to move away from you. One leans over his desk, the other leans back in his chair and thus maintains an escape distance. If it is impossible to move away (for example, in a cramped elevator), he will take a closed posture (arms crossed on his chest, legs crossed, etc.).

Energetic handshake

You probably were not particularly surprised when the farewell after the negotiations was accompanied by more vigorous handshakes than the meeting; an indispensable condition - in the process of dialogue, mutual sympathy was born. It also happens vice versa, when, after unsuccessful attempts to agree on a farewell handshake, it is omitted with the tacit consent of both parties.

In any case, be very careful about the manner in which you shake hands. However short the handshake is, the joining of the hands must be pleasant, otherwise it is in your best interest to keep the distance.

Quite a large part of your feelings and the feelings of your interlocutor is expressed in the blink of an eye at the contact of the palms. The social intelligence of your hands is a powerful subconscious signal of likes or dislikes that your consciousness hides as it is won over by the goal being achieved.

firm handshake

Every time the interlocutor shakes your hand, he squeezes it too tightly.

For example, when the boss crushes your hand when shaking, he demonstrates his strong-willed character. He obviously lacks confidence, otherwise there would be no need for this boasting.

Such a handshake is often found in those who are in search of conflict in order to get rid of the painful feeling of inferiority. It is quite popular, although far from the only and not the most The best way raise self-esteem when you feel vulnerable. If you react with a grimace of exaggerated pain, he will love it. Your facial expressions will warm his vanity. “You are strong,” your hand will say, clamped as in a vise.

sluggish handshake

Through this tactile exchange, you can either pass on an energy signal to another or refuse to do so. A sluggish hand is the very case when energy exchange is denied.

A limp handshake usually belongs to a weak-willed person, even if he wields some power. Do not trust the scope of his activities or reputation, they are inflated; trust his handshake, which is more eloquent than his fake smile. This is rot. A limp handshake usually belongs to a perennial student or politician whose ambitions are infinitely inflated in comparison to his charisma and real leadership potential.

mechanical handshake

The interlocutor shakes your hand, looking over your shoulder. This is a mechanical handshake. It indicates a lack of respect for the owner of the outstretched hand, which is perceived as something ghostly.

Languid handshake

The interlocutor languidly holds her hand palm down in yours, as if for a kiss. The handshake takes precedence over her complaints and lamentations. Your interlocutor is really submissive or very sensual, which can get along great. This type of handshake betrays a submissive woman in love with the male power or irresistibility of her interlocutor. Such contact is pleasant, although a little sluggish.

Your interlocutor shakes hands with you with mock languor, meanwhile you noticed that he greeted other people present differently. Such a special handshake means a refusal to recognize you as equal or even worthy.

Handshake with fingers

Instead of extending their hand to you, they only extend their index finger to you.

In the eyes of the interlocutor, there is only a virtual image that will dissipate ten seconds after you leave. Your interlocutor is symbolically preparing to say goodbye to you, without even meeting you. Such a gesture betrays demotivation, additionally colored with distrust towards the one to whom he gives a finger instead of an open hand.

If your interlocutor has a habit of shaking hands in this way, know that he belongs to the category of people who take up the matter only superficially and keep their promises in exceptional cases.

Is there a difference in the meaning of the gesture depending on the number of fingers extended? Unlikely. In any case, we do not recommend approaching a person shaking your hand in this way. And if, despite everything, you still have to endure a handshake for family or any other reasons, come up with something so that next time you don’t shake hands; you can try copying the gesture and extend your finger in response

elusive handshake

When shaking hands, the gaze slips somewhere far away. A fascinating sight, because this pose gives the manipulator the appearance of almost a biblical prophet. "I see even further than you can guess" - such is the hidden meaning of this handshake.

Some Democratic politicians overuse this view unnecessarily and do not realize that they are devaluing their public image. A dictator may have the same habit, but he is sure that he does not risk losing the votes of the electorate because of some kind of gesture. Take a closer look at the small bosses with a similar look that you have to meet in the office, it can be educational.

When shaking hands, the interlocutor's hand slips away like an eel. As soon as you have time to shake his hand, yours is completely empty, hovering in the air. If the interlocutor shakes hands in an elusive way, run! The duality of man is the highest degree of hypocrisy, and you will see it very soon. You are standing in front of a scammer who, at best, will grant you a fake smile. You have to be completely blind and deaf to trust him. He is stingier than Moliere's Harpagon (a character personifying greed). If you are going to sell him something, even if the deal goes through, he will find many reasons why you will lower the price.

Shoulder touch while shaking hands

Standing to your side, the interlocutor puts his right hand on your left shoulder. Shoulder squeezing is typically manipulative intimacy if it appears outside of a friendship or love acquaintance.

The same thing can happen on the right side, but then the meaning will be completely different. The right shoulder is the symbolic center of ambition, and putting your hand on it, your interlocutor is probably playing overlord.

For example, the boss leaves his office to go around all departments of the enterprise and greet the employees and say an additional word of encouragement to everyone. After shaking hands, he necessarily holds his hand on the right shoulder of the employee.

Therefore, touching the shoulder is a common sign of an aggressive (or intrusive) handshake.

Invading (aggressive) handshake

It also happens with touching other parts of the body. This kind of handshake is a bit intrusive, and the physical intrusion is just a prelude to the psychological one. The conqueror is almost always a liar. He lures you to his field by force. He pulls you into his desires. His handshake is a micro-message, expressing his goals briefly and clearly. He counts on you completely and completely even before you agree to anything.

If such a handshake comes from one another, then there is nothing more to talk about. However, there are such friends with whom it is better to be enemies. But if they are in a business relationship with you, then you urgently need to take it back. Your interlocutor expects to ask you much more than you will be able to offer him. He wants to influence or manipulate you from the first minute they meet.

The classic conqueror is the cattle driver, and physical contact is his weapon of choice. He will squeeze your hand with such enthusiasm, as if you met after twenty years of separation. He will grab your elbow, cling to your sleeve, emphasizing his speech, in short, he will take over your body. Running off the field in such conditions is not very convenient. But if you remember this method of manipulation, in case of alarm, your distrust will receive the necessary evidence.

Handshake with two hands

If the interlocutor shakes your hand with both hands, then he portrays friendliness, which he does not feel at all. Outwardly, this is an ardent gesture, but such a handshake betrays the predatory nature of the one who performs it. The interlocutor pretends that you are the same person whom you have been looking forward to for so long and who has finally arrived.

What does a two-handed handshake mean? If your boss shakes your hand like this, it's best to prepare in advance for petty niggles or even punishment. When it comes to a merchant's visit, spit on all his offers, because he only needs to expand his business, and you are a lucky victim who will allow him to get out of a predicament. Why does he need both hands? Perhaps in order to imprison your mechanisms of determination...

Long handshake

The interlocutor squeezes your hand for an exaggeratedly long time, in fact, does not let go of it.

The longer the handshake, the more fake it is. Such a handshake is an act of manipulation, a kind of covert submission under the guise of friendliness. Logically squeeze the right hand, which symbolizes left hemisphere brain, i.e. rational intelligence.

Abnormal handshake length is a carefully calculated way to engulf and subdue your logical thinking and disable defensive responses. A long handshake is one of the favorite gestures of all kinds of gurus. He does not need you, but your unconditional acceptance of his doctrine and submission to his desires.

In seduction, the initiator of an endless handshake tries to convey a love message to a person whom he really likes, but to whom he does not want to declare his love. He holds his hand for as long as possible, looking for the slightest hint of reciprocity or rejection on the face of his victim. With this handshake, a double grip is possible at the level of the wrist, the center of a sense of security and insecurity. An unconscious way to calm the interlocutor by expanding the channel of emotional exchange.

If this is your friend, then it is better to keep your distance, since his friendship may depend entirely on the benefits derived from it. The gesture is aimed at penetrating your defense system. Along with this, the handshake in question is often accompanied by what is called carnivorous hands - your hand is enclosed in the jaw of the interlocutor's clenched hands.

"Can I get my hand back?" This witty prank is practically the only way to restore enough distance with the manipulator without hitting it too much. If you watch his gaze carefully as he loosens his grip, you may notice a glint that betrays disappointment. As if he realized that you frustrated his designs and yours. critical thinking worked again. Keep your guard up throughout the conversation; exaggeratedly long handshakes are synonymous with a hidden threat from someone who is trying to take possession of your hand, and therefore your mind.

Sitting handshake

The owner of the office shakes your hand without even bothering to get up to greet you. No overlord rises to greet his vassal. If he had done so, he would have signaled hierarchical equality. The boss who receives you in this way needs any confirmation of his shattered authority. But if he gets up to walk you to the door, you can be sure that you won him over. If he lets you go without getting up, he thinks you've wasted his precious time. It is by such trifles that you can evaluate the results of a meeting or meeting.

Who is the first to give a hand in a handshake?

If your interlocutor, when meeting, is the first to extend his hand for a handshake, then you have carte blanche. If you are, then you will have to work hard to convince him of the benefits of your visit.

In any game, the one who extends his hand first loses more often. Therefore, the popular expression “The main thing is the ability to pause, the bigger the artist, the longer he has a pause. Do not pause unnecessarily, and if you took it, pull it as long as you can! can be applied to the handshake. If you are waiting for the interlocutor to be the first to reach out to you, try to pause until the last.

Handshake refusal

Did one of those present refuse to shake your hand? Forgets or refuses, leaving his hands in his pockets, crossed or lowered along the body? A missed handshake is a sign of either lack of respect or contempt on the part of your interlocutor. Do not shake hands with the enemy and boor. Some ultra-shy people also find it difficult to step up and shake hands with their colleagues.

If this happens, go out, you don't even have to apologize. Refusal to shake hands- this is pure recognition of antipathy. You will benefit enormously, far more than what you could claim after the meeting. When someone refuses to shake an outstretched hand, this is a signal of the impossibility of an agreement.

Adapted from: Messinger J. C. Ces gestes qui vous trahissent - Paris: France, 2013


The centuries-old handshake ritual has developed a certain average force value that men put into their hand, squeezing the hand of another person when meeting or parting. Each person is able to control this force so that the handshake is not only firm enough, but also not too soft or using an incomplete palm, which rather characterizes a person who is weak-willed, compliant, insecure, and therefore unworthy of respect, at least in the first approximation. . Or you may get the impression that such a person disdains to say hello, which again lowers his status in the eyes of the interlocutor. But sometimes there are people whose handshake is characterized by increased strength and rigidity. Why is this happening, what drives these people? I see the following possible reasons.

1. With a firm handshake, a man tries to demonstrate his strength and superiority over other men. A handshake is the first act at a meeting, after which a very definite opinion can be formed about a person. For example, a wet hand (a sign of possible emotional excitement) can greatly spoil the impression of a person and affect the entire course of further negotiations. It is possible that the status of a man with a strong handshake is lower than the status of others, so it is enough in a simple way it tries to align the specified position. If not intelligence, then at least strength. Fear of power, whatever one may say, still remains a fairly significant argument. Both at the interpersonal and intergroup level of communication.

2. The reason is purely physiological. Brain through nerve impulses (currents) instructs the muscles to contract or relax. Such a person has a broken sense of proportion, that is, the brain gives too strong an impulse to shake hands, which does not correspond to the current situation. By the way, I had an acquaintance who had something disturbed in his motor apparatus: he spoke incomprehensibly, moved angularly and absurdly, involuntarily grimaced, etc. The patient is generally disabled. So his handshake was quite strong and hard, he was not able to do it otherwise, his hand seemed to cramp.

3. As I have noticed, a stronger handshake is more common among people of low social status. This is quite natural - intellectual rivalry is replaced by muscular rivalry. A feature of certain layers of the social pyramid, which you just need to take into account and do as others do in order to communicate in a language understandable to everyone. I also met the same among amateur bodybuilders. There, a firm handshake is a sign of a "cooler" development of the muscular system. (in particular, bench press), an element of competition, transferred to everyday communication, which again increases personal status.

A handshake between two people can really be much more truthful and informative - even thousands of words.

The habit of shaking hands as a gesture of greeting is present in almost all cultures. But if in ancient times the greeting ritual of different nations could differ significantly, now, in the era of globalization of any processes, including cultural ones, we have received a universal and fairly standard way to greet another person - a handshake.

But only at first glance - this simple action is typical and does not contain any individuality. In fact, there are a lot of handshake options. And depending on the situation, attitude to the interlocutor and the nature of the situation, each of us chooses one way or another to shake hands with another person.

Based on the characteristics of the greeting, one can draw conclusions about how people who greet each other actually relate to each other, what emotions they experience, what they intend to do. Many of these hidden signals are unknown not only to outside observers, but also to the participants in the greeting ritual.

And now we will consider all types and characteristics handshakes, which can be very useful in life - and when you try to understand who is in charge among politicians, how colleagues, boss or relatives treat you.

Hand position during a handshake

First of all, it is worth starting with the position of the hands during the handshake. With a standard handshake, which has a neutral character, the hands of the greeting participants are in the same position. They are perpendicular to the surface of the earth and the degree of the angle in the region of the elbow joint will be approximately the same for each.

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Such a handshake indicates a neutral attitude of those who greet each other. In any case, the participants of the greeting do not experience any vivid emotions. People shaking hands in this way are prone to compromise, rational behavior (unless their handshake is overly forceful, but more on that later).

The handshake shown in the figure below has a completely different meaning. The hand of one person is turned down, and the second, on the contrary, looks up with the open part. These are examples of classic opposite types of behavior. Member A demonstrates his arrogant attitude towards participant B, which in turn demonstrates a willingness to obey.


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On the left is participant B, on the right is participant A

Position participant A often indicates powerful and authoritarian personalities. In this case, we can say that A shows his authority, his higher social status. This does not always correspond to the actual state of affairs. Rather, desired. After all, people endowed with power and authority do not often demonstrate them - even with such, almost unconscious gestures. So their handshake is often neutral.

This type of handshake often indicates a desire to get something from your interlocutor. Moreover, we are talking mainly about intangible acquisitions. Member A may be aimed at obtaining confirmation of submission, agreement with some opinion or attitude. Position participant B says the opposite. Such a handshake speaks of the demonstrated friendliness, peacefulness, readiness to make concessions, readiness to sacrifice one's interests and resources for the interests and goals of the interlocutor. People who give their hand in this way seek to find the favor of their greeting partner and are ready to step on the throat of their pride for this. This type of handshake is called the "sycophant handshake". The natural enhancers of such a sycophantic position are the outstretched arm, the bent back, the ingratiating smile, the half-bent knees.


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Sometimes we have to deal with the fact that we give a hand for a neutral handshake, and our partner demonstrates participant A's position, seeking to drive us deeper under the plinth and force us to make a "sycophant handshake." What to do in such a situation?

The answer lies in the realm of non-verbal communication. It is necessary to take half a step towards your unfriendly interlocutor, without tearing your hands. This will cause the interlocutor to turn his hand to a normal vertical position. Then you can take a step back and only then stop the handshake. Thus, your interlocutor at an unconscious level will be rebuffed, and this will make him treat you more carefully and respectfully. The effect can be enhanced by a "friendly" pat on the shoulder or by touching the interlocutor's hand with the left hand. Usually, after such contact, an unfriendly interlocutor looks discouraged and does not show any signs of authoritarian behavior.


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Second hand during a handshake

When shaking hands, not only the hand with which you greet is important, but also left hand(if you are right-handed), as it expresses the attitude towards the interlocutor much more accurately.

Let's start from a neutral position. The left hand is relaxed and hangs along the body. There is no point in interpreting anything here. Normal relationship. Nothing extraordinary should be expected from a person whose left hand is not involved in any way at the time of the handshake.

If the interlocutor begins to connect the left hand to the handshake process, this indicates that the process begins to carry more emotions and more personal relationships. In such cases, likes and dislikes, hidden and explicit intentions, a desire to show sympathy, provide support, get rid of someone else's presence, or a desire to enter into closer relationships are manifested.


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In ordinary communication, the distance at which communication takes place matters. The further away the interlocutor is from you, the more formal, neutral your relationship is. The closer he comes, the warmer feelings he expects. The exception, of course, is the option with a deliberately extremely negative attitude, when we shorten the distance not out of a desire to hug, but out of a desire to strangle the interlocutor.

In a handshake, the distance value remains the same. Especially when we use the left hand in the ritual.

To begin, consider touch in the area of ​​the hand. Far distance.

In this case, touching the hand is a sign that not the closest relationship has been established between the interlocutors. Most likely, they are in the nature of one-time social transactions. Interlocutor touching free hand to the brush of another person, at the moment is not in a close relationship with him, they feel the distance.

Now let's take a closer look at various types touches.

1. During a handshake, your interlocutor grabs your hand with his left hand. Such a position is called "grip grip".


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Despite the fact that such a capture is perceived mainly negatively, it nevertheless has positive value. Thus, the interlocutor expresses his best disposition. Depending on the strength of the handshake, one can also talk about the delight of the meeting, which overwhelms a person. The stronger they shake your hand, holding it in a "glove", the greater the joy they experience from communicating with you. Such a handshake is often awarded to pop and movie stars.

Additional markers confirming this mood are the distance and inclination of the interlocutor's body.

A long distance speaks of a cautious, one might even say touching attitude. But if the hand fell into such a grip, and the interlocutor approached a very short distance, this means that some preferences are expected from you: acceptance, relative position, reciprocal signs of attention.

If, after such a handshake, your interlocutor brings the palms clasped together to his face, as if covering it lower part, we can say that he is experiencing incredible delight from the meeting.

2. Palm from below

In this case, the interlocutor's left hand is like a platform on which your hands rest when shaking hands. This situation speaks of an unconscious desire to provide support, help, console, help with advice. In fact, this gesture demonstrates a willingness to help. If you are faced with this position of the hands, no doubt you can ask for help from your interlocutor - he will help.


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3. Palm on top

The palm of the left hand, covering your hand from above at the moment of shaking hands, means an expression of care and participation.


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This is almost always true when the handshake is between people of different genders or ages. At the same time, if you observe such a position of hands during a handshake between two men of approximately the same age and social status, then the situation can be completely opposite.

Also in this case, you need to pay attention to the context of the situation. If a person puts his palm on top immediately during a handshake, then, probably, we are talking about expressing deep positive feelings towards the interlocutor. If this gesture is formed as a response to any words or movements that have already arisen in the course of the conversation (and the hands do not break contact), then most likely this indicates an attempt to show one's ego, a desire to show who is in charge here.


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The handshake is done in the manner of equal partners, but there are two nuances that point to the superiority of Obama. 1. With his left hand, Obama pats Yatsenyuk on the shoulder. This is a gesture of intrusion into the personal space of a communication partner. Yatsenyuk does not make similar attempts, which only strengthens the effect of Obama's influence. 2. Yatsenyuk's back is so tense that it seems that he stretched out in front of Obama like a rookie in front of a sergeant. In general, the photograph demonstrates Yatsenyuk's tension and his recognition of the higher status of his interlocutor. However, one should not get carried away with interpretations and argue that Yatsenyuk is demonstrating some signs of submission. There is respect, there is tension in the pose, there is tightness, but subordination is on this photo missing

In addition, such a gesture can also occur as a result of a reaction to the unfriendly behavior of the interlocutor or his intrusion into the intimate zone.

Is there a difference between the position of the palm below and above? Undoubtedly. A person who places his palm on the bottom is more inclined to provide any help and support that you ask for. But the person whose palm is on top usually already understands perfectly well what exactly you will need and useful at this moment and in this situation. That is, the difference between the location of the palms reflects the presence or absence of an initiative position. The palm below is a sign of acceptance of your initiative. The palm on top is a sign of readiness to take your own initiative.

This is not always the case. Body position can turn this interpretation on its head.

Touching the interlocutor. Close range

A person can touch the interlocutor with his left hand both in the area of ​​​​the forearm and in the area of ​​\u200b\u200bthe elbow joint. And in some cases, we place our hand on the shoulder or even put an arm around the back of the one we greet.


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This is where the laws of distance come into play. The closer to the body is the place where the hand of your interlocutor is fixed, the greater the need for communication he feels. Touching the forearm and touching the shoulder have different degrees of expression of those feelings. The most extreme degree is, of course, hugs. Well, or patting the interlocutor on the back.

Do not forget that hugs can also be of the nature of subcultural features. Young people of athletic appearance who greet each other with strong hugs do not always feel too warm feelings for each other. Most likely, this type of greeting is a consequence of their own rituals. They are so accepted. In any case, to assess the relationship of people by their handshake, one should take into account the context of the situation, the influence of cultural and social characteristics.

The strength and duration of the handshake

In addition to the handshake itself, several other factors are important.

1. The power of the handshake. The stronger they shake your hand, the more emotional energy the interlocutor is ready to pour into communication. At the same time, a sluggish handshake is not yet a sign of hostility. Maybe the person just doesn't feel well. And a strong handshake, respectively, is not always a sign of a complacent disposition. The strength of compression indicates only the willingness to spend a certain amount of muscle energy during communication with you. But what will be the nature of the application of this energy depends on completely different factors.

2. Duration of contact. There is a direct correlation with the time that the interlocutor is willing to spend communicating with you. The longer he shakes your hand, the longer the conversation he expects. The shorter the handshake, the faster the opponent is ready to "resolve" all issues and deal with others, more important things. Often a short handshake indicates the desire of your interlocutor to quickly move on to resolving the issue for which you met. In this case, brevity will indicate a reluctance to waste time on formal procedures.

Interpretation errors

When you analyze non-verbal communication, you understand that not a single gesture and not a single sign is one hundred percent reliable. Moreover, sometimes the same gesture in different situations can be completely opposite.

In order to make fewer mistakes in the interpretation of gestures (and it will not be possible to completely get rid of them), one should always make an adjustment for the context of the situation, the characteristics of the culture and social group, a combination of gesture with posture and facial expressions. But key features handshakes in most cases remain unchanged.

The main thing:

1. The handshake expresses the attitude towards the interlocutor. And if a person can lie in words, then through a handshake, the truth is much more likely to be correctly interpreted.

2. Handshake distance means only how much they intend to contact you. A short distance does not necessarily mean a positive location.

3. The stronger the handshake, the greater the desire to make contact. And the more emotions overwhelm your interlocutor.

4. The main signs of a formal handshake are: long distance, sluggish handshake, short hand contact time. This indicates a lack of interest in communication.

5. If the left hand is used in a handshake, this is a sign that the interlocutor puts more personal relationship into contact with you than in other cases and with other people.

I also propose to watch and try to analyze the video of real and interesting handshakes of President Petro Poroshenko with Catherine Ashton, Vladimir Putin, Nursultan Nazarbayev and Alexander Lukashenko in Minsk - using only acquired knowledge.

And now - check the conclusions drawn. So, Ashton expresses his support for Poroshenko by performing a “glove” handshake gesture, covering the palm of the Ukrainian president from above. Poroshenko shows a positive attitude towards Ashton by smiling, but the time of eye contact with her is very short. Before the handshake with Ashton is over, his eyes are already on Putin.

The handshake with Putin is defiantly cold. Too sharp, theatrical transition from a smile addressed to Ashton, to tense walking jaws and a petrified look addressed to Putin.

In the next second, the tension in Poroshenko's posture begins to subside and the duty handshake with Nazarbayev is already taking place under the auspices of a slight smile. And Lukashenka gets all the emotional stash from Poroshenko - both a smile, and a turn of the body shoulder to shoulder, and a caring "glove" when shaking hands.

The conclusion is that Poroshenko's coldness towards Putin is feigned, emphasized, somewhat exaggerated. And this was done in contrast to the smiles of other participants in the meeting, specifically to emphasize the negative attitude towards him.

Have you decided to start your own business? Or maybe you are interested in psychology? In both cases, you may be interested in the types of handshakes. People rarely think about sign language. Nevertheless, our body is very talkative, and its message is always subconsciously interpreted by the interlocutor. This article will discuss how to properly greet people.

The most common type of handshake is the salute, in which people hold their hands upright. Such a gesture can be interpreted as equality of partners. People who treat their acquaintance well and feel quite relaxed in his society always resort to this type of greeting. This is how friends and colleagues greet each other. Since the types of handshakes in psychology play an important role, even many women today resort to this type of greeting in order to be accepted by a man on equal terms. Therefore, business women should always watch their palm. If a girl wants communication to take place on an equal footing, she should not fill up her palm and should not allow a man to do this. And if everything goes to the fact that the partner is trying to seize the initiative, it will not be very rude if you release your hand.

Do you want to show your superiority? Then you can offer your hand for a handshake, palm down. Your interlocutor will have no choice but to obey you and turn his palm up. When the hand is on top, a person involuntarily has an association with dominance. Such psychological pressure can significantly affect the entire future dialogue. The dominant type of handshake is used by self-confident businessmen. They are used to subordinating people to themselves and want their whole life to proceed according to a pre-written script. If the person described above is not you, but you have such a person in your environment, you need to be careful with her. Do not go too far, but do not obey. How to do it? When greeting, be the first to extend your hand. Raise your palm vertically. When the interlocutor responds to the greeting, roll his hand down a lot. Thus, you will be able to unobtrusively seize the initiative.

As you may have guessed, this palm position is preferred by losers. Think about the type of handshake you greet your acquaintances with? If your hand turns over automatically, then you have problems with self-esteem. You can say the same about acquaintances who initially occupy the position of a subordinate. Such a handshake can be found at work when office employees greet the director. Does a person's pride indulge in the fact that they obey him? Certainly. But keep in mind, you will never get promoted if you don't greet the person as an equal. You can never take the position of a subordinate. Don't bend. Raise your self-esteem and give your palm vertically.

Considering the types of handshakes and their meaning, one cannot fail to mention how close friends greet each other. It usually goes like this. One friend responds to the handshake, and then one of the friends covers both joined hands with his palm. It turns out a kind of glove, in which the hand of one of the interlocutors is clamped. Such a gesture can be considered as sincere hospitality. Usually, such a handshake is followed by a hug. This is how father and son, close relatives, for example, brothers or friends who have not seen each other for several years, can meet each other.

But this gesture can be used for other purposes as well. For example, when your interlocutor deliberately lowers your hand, assuming a dominant position, you can outwit your opponent. Cover his hand with yours. Such a glove handshake will have the strongest effect of defusing the atmosphere.

This greeting is most often found in unfamiliar people. Finding out what is important different kinds handshakes, it is necessary to mention about squeezing only the tips of the fingers. Thus, a person wants to show his interlocutor that he has no intention of getting close. Such detachment often slips between business partners, a man and a woman. The representative of the stronger sex shakes ladies' fingers, as if demonstrating with such a gesture that he does not consider his interlocutor as an equal partner. What can be done to improve the situation? Step one step closer to your partner. By this act, you show that you are crossing the border of his personal space and have the intention to become closer.

Do you want to be perceived as a confident person? Then the handshake should be energetic and strong. There is no need to squeeze the interlocutor's hand in a vise, but do not greet acquaintances simply out of inertia. Start saying hello more consciously. After all, self-confidence must begin to form gradually. Do not let go of the interlocutor's hand immediately. You need to shake it well several times. This will show the person that you want a long-term relationship. To make a good impression, keep your hand upright and don't swing it into a dominant position.

People who have no ambition are used to going with the flow. Therefore, considering various types of handshakes, you need to pay attention to individuals who are used to "lazy" greetings. It seems that a person is not very happy to see you when he gives you a hand. He will shake it easily and try to return his palm to his pocket as quickly as possible. The self-doubt of such a person and lack of ambition are visible to the naked eye. If you notice that someone you know matches the description, talk to them. Perhaps the person has fallen into depression and he just needs help and support. If you notice signs of a sluggish handshake in yourself, contact a psychotherapist immediately, even if there are no other reasons to worry. The subconscious can hide from consciousness the problems that need to be solved.

quick handshake

Confident people won't say hello to you for a long time. They have a busy work schedule and will not want to spend time on long foreplay. There are different types of handshakes. Some people try to withdraw their hand almost instantly, others wait two or three seconds. The second type of people are self-confident persons, which were discussed above. But the people who try to get rid of you right away are individuals who do not want to communicate with you. They may smile invitingly, but this smile should be seen as a mask. Dislike is difficult to hide on a non-verbal level, it is too conspicuous if you know where to look.

Handshake with bent arm

How to understand that a person wants to hide something? Look at his hand while shaking hands. If the elbow is bent and pressed to the body, this is a signal. Another person practicing such a handshake can pull his hand down, thus trying to disengage the handshake. A confident person who has nothing to hide will never say hello in this way. But a person who is lying or trying to hide something always tries to hide his palms. His hands will look down, and immediately after the greeting they will hide in his pockets. During a handshake, your interlocutor will direct his gaze to the floor, and not to your eyes.

Exceptions

You can see the welcome gestures in the photo. Types of handshakes and their meaning in question in this article may not be entirely reliable. After all, as you know, there are exceptions to any rule. People may behave in unusual ways if they have reasons to do so. For example, it is foolish to expect a firm handshake from a person with arthritis. But at the same time his business acumen can be more than certain. Musicians and neurosurgeons protect their fingers, so they will not bother with a strong and long handshake. And a woman who is not related to business may not understand a man if he shakes her hand, and does not kiss her.