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As 40 days after death are commemorated. Please tell us where the soul of a person arrives after his death, why are the days of commemoration the third, ninth and fortieth? Sample speech

40 days after death is a special date, since it is at this time that the verdict is issued, deciding the place for the soul where it will be until the Last Judgment.

If you want the deceased to go to a better place, then you need to pray for him, because this is a sure way to change the verdict in favor of a better option.

But you can only pray for suicides if the priest has blessed you to do so. It is also forbidden to submit any notes for suicides.

Wake - means commemoration. Initially, they were arranged for poor people who, after eating food, could pray for the deceased. It makes no sense to call loved ones to commemoration, especially unbelievers, since they will not benefit the deceased in any way. The mere presence at the commemoration does not mean that such people have remembered.

It is imperative to eat the cemetery: to be near the grave and remember the bright moments in life associated with this person. At this time, you can consider which permanent headstone will be installed - an accessible marble monument or.

40 days after death - how to remember the dead

Only with sincere prayer can a person be remembered. That is why it is advisable to gather for the commemoration of people of faith who will pray for the deceased. The commemoration is needed to establish a connection with the soul of the deceased, and if this is not achieved, then there is no point in commemorating.

I would like people to understand that the table during the commemoration, when it comes 40 days after death, should not shine with exquisite dishes and, accordingly, drinks.
The food should be as simple as possible, and best of all, lean. Food should encourage you to pray, and that is what simple food is perfect for.

According to Orthodox traditions, at each commemoration there should be such a dish as kutia. It symbolizes rebirth and happiness in the future. The commemoration begins with a special prayer over kutya, then everyone present should taste only one spoonful of this dish. It has already been mentioned that lean food goes well with the table, especially during fasting times. It is best to keep all the rules of the fast, so we show the Lord that we follow all the commandments and express our great love through sacrifices.

At the commemoration, we try to get closer to the deceased, we do everything possible to make a certain sacred bond appear, but alcohol at the commemoration will in no way allow us to find it. A drinking person harms the deceased, he only moves away from him. The soul of the drunkard will be separated from the soul that goes to the Best place. In hell, every soul remains completely alone. That is why we must do everything so that forty days after death the scales tilt in favor of the Holy Place.

If the commemoration does not fall on fasting, then you still need to avoid dishes that are created only in order to eat. At the commemoration, the main thing is prayers, not food, prayers are important here, and not pleasing guests.

The table at the commemoration should be arranged according to the following rules: it is better to avoid alcohol at all, it is useless, lean or the simplest food that promotes prayers. You can bring more value by donating money to charity rather than organizing a fancy table. Prioritize.

In no case should the commemoration be perceived as a gathering of all relatives, as a social event or a feast. It is very important to remember that the most important action should be prayers in the name of the deceased.
If you are afraid that the deceased cannot find peace, or if you want to comfort him in the other world, go to the priest for confession before all prayers. There is nothing more pleasant for the deceased than confession. Confessing all your sins and continuing to pray in the temple is the best thing you can do for the soul of the deceased.

Why is it so important? Because we gain harmony, become close to the Lord and loved ones. Because of this, prayer becomes so powerful and brings benefit and joy to the dead.

Give up some sin in the name of the deceased. It will also give him peace and comfort. Even if you cannot pray, but give up at least for some period of time from some sin, then such actions will also be counted as a sacrifice and will benefit the one for whom all this is being done. For example, you can give up some bad habit: quit smoking or give up alcohol. It will only make everyone better.

As far as hanging mirrors is concerned, in fact, this is a rather useless action. What you can do is stop watching TV, at least for forty days. Those who watch TV are very far from spiritual closeness with the deceased and, accordingly, they will not be able to honor him with their prayers or actions.

All these thoughtless programs only dull and kill everything spiritual in a person for a very long time. Having abandoned the TV, we will not only become closer to the human soul, but also enrich our inner world. In addition, when we watch TV, the soul of the deceased, watching us, is disappointed in us, because instead of prayers we spend time mindlessly watching TV. The whole meaning of past efforts is lost, all connection is lost. All sacred actions were in vain, because we ourselves harm the connection that we tried so diligently to maintain.

Do not indulge in fun and entertainment during all these forty days. Indeed, during mourning, it is not customary to have fun and have fun, otherwise this time would not be called mourning at all. The fun only breaks that close bond with the deceased. During the celebration of something, we completely forget about our main responsibility, we plunge into an atmosphere of fun and again we lose the fragile connection that is so difficult to find again. Let's not ruin all our efforts by indulging in primitive entertainment. You will still have time to have fun and maybe soon, but only forty days after death is clearly not this time. Try to control yourself.

How to dress 40 days after death

What is the role of the mourning garment? It is very important to externally show mourning, wear appropriate clothing, because it helps to maintain strictness and observe proper behavior, as well as encourage prayer. However, one must remember that mourning is expressed not only by clothing, but also by the state of the soul. Therefore, of course, you must, of course, first of all take care of the state of mind, rather than the appearance, since clothes are only an auxiliary attribute for gaining that very state of mind.

Everything in a person is closely related, the state of mind depends on the position of the body and, accordingly, on the vestments. That is why it is important that your clothes are simple and strict, no pretentiousness or openness. No decorativeness, practical attire is just that. Perhaps everyone noticed that when clothes do not match the situation, then you feel uncomfortable, and also that clothes partially set the tone for your mood, which is why inappropriate clothes will distract you from the most important thing at a commemoration after 40 days after death - from prayers ...

Forget about an open outfit, it is completely out of place here, and besides, it will only grieve the soul of the deceased because of the manifestation of the most real disrespect for him. Taking care of the style, you pay less attention to prayers, thereby you bring with you negative energy, which will only be to the detriment of the deceased, who so needs our prayers to gain complete peace and tranquility.

Therefore, having gathered for the commemoration, think first of all about the deceased, about how exactly you can make his fate easier, how to make him go to a better world.

The death of a close friend or relative is an event that fills everyone's heart with grief. But believers find consolation in prayers and actions that help the soul of the deceased to leave earthly life as easily as possible. Therefore, sincere prayers and commemorations are a great help in this.

Meaning 40 days after death

According to Christian customs, the third, ninth and fortieth dayafter death has a special significance for the soul of the deceased, however, the fortieth day is the most important for him, after all, it means that the soul leaves the earth forever and appears at God's judgment to determine its future fate. And that is why this date is considered the most tragic than the physical death of a loved one or loved one.

Our body is in unity with the soul all our lives, but when a person dies, the soul leaves the body, taking with it all the existing habits of a person that he had during his lifetime, passions, attachments, as well as good and bad deeds. The soul does not have the ability to forget and should receive a reward or punishment for the acts committed during the period of a person's life.

On the fortieth day she passes the hardest test, since before crossing the border of earthly life, he fully reports on the days he has lived. It is necessary to understand what is being done 40 days after death.

What happens to the soul on the fortieth day

Until the onset of the fortieth day, the soul does not leave its places of residence, since it cannot get a proper understanding of what to do without a physical shell.

On 3rd or 4th day she gradually begins to come to a new state and can let go of his body and walk around the neighborhood near his home.

On 40th day or in the coming days thereafter the soul can go down to earth for the last time to visit its favorite places and say goodbye to them forever. Many people who have lost their loved ones told that they had dreams about how their deceased relative came to say goodbye and said that he was leaving forever.

It is important to understand that you can't cry loudly after a person's death and, moreover, throw hysterics, because the soul will hear everything and will experience insurmountable torment along with this. Therefore, it is best to resort to prayers or read the Holy Scriptures in difficult moments of sorrow.

What is done on the fortieth day after death

On the 40th day, the relatives of the deceased should visit the church. It is important that people who come to the temple are baptized, as well as the deceased, about whom one should file a note "On the repose".

Also on this day, you must adhere to the following rules of church commemoration:

Important on this day visit the cemetery and bring to the departed person flowers and lamps... In each bouquet that will be laid on his grave, the number of flowers must be even, and it does not matter whether these are artificial or natural flowers.

In Orthodoxy, on the fortieth day, it is necessary go through all the things of the deceased and take them to church or distribute to people in need. Carrying out such a ritual is considered a good deed that will help the deceased and will be reckoned with when deciding on the fate of his soul. Relatives can keep things that will be valuable as memory. You can't throw things away.

The more on the 40th day will sound kind words and sincere prayers about the soul of the deceased, the better it will be for the grieving about him and the deceased himself; therefore, an important event is a memorial dinner, to which the relatives of the deceased person invite close friends and acquaintances of the deceased.

It is important to note that it is allowed to hold the commemoration earlier or later than the exact date, which falls on 40 days. The priests explain this by the fact that life itself is unpredictable and often people are not able to carry out the planned events, therefore, the discrepancy of the date is not considered a sin. However, it is forbidden to transfer the commemoration to the cemetery or funeral service.

How to remember the dead correctly

There are assumptions about what happens to the soul on the 40th day: the soul of the deceased returns home and after a day is gone forever. Therefore, Christians believe that if you do not see her off and do not make a "farewell", then she will suffer forever. That is why special attention is paid to this event. There are many conflicting opinions about how to commemorate on day 40.

However, there are a number of specific rules that must be followed:

What is cooked for a memorial dinner

On the memorial day, organizing a dinner is as obligatory as reading prayers for a deceased person. The purpose of this dinner is to remember the deceased and help in the repose of his soul. In this case, food is not the main component at the commemoration, so there is no need to prepare gorgeous dishes and feed the gathered people with delicacies.

When compiling a menu, you must adhere to several important principles:

Whom to invite to the commemoration

On the 40th day after the death of the deceased for a memorial dinner his relatives and good friends gather, in order to properly accompany the deceased and honor his memory, remembering the bright and significant moments from his life.

It is customary to invite to the commemoration not only relatives and friends of the deceased person, but also his colleagues, mentors and students.In fact, it is not so important who comes to the commemoration, it may be strangers to the relatives of the deceased, the main thing is that each of them treats the deceased well.

How and what they say for 40 days

At the memorial table, it is customary to remember not only the deceased person, about whom everyone gathered, but also other deceased relatives.And the deceased himself must be presented as if he, too, is at the commemoration.

Memorial speech is delivered while standing... According to Christian tradition, it is considered obligatory to honor the deceased with a minute of silence. It is recommended to appoint a facilitator (a good family friend) who can control their emotions and make sure that everyone, in order of priority, can say kind words about the deceased.

The facilitator should prepare several phrases in advance to defuse the situation in case the speech of a relative causes tears and strong emotions of the gathered people. With prepared phrases, the presenter will also be able to distract the guests if the speech of the speaker is also interrupted due to tears.

While at home, before or after the commemoration, you can turn to God in your own words or read a prayer to Saint Uar for asking for the freedom of the deceased from eternal torment.

The leader's responsibilities include:

It is not allowed to talk about inheritance or diseases of family members, as well as about the personal life of those present - this is not something that needs to be said at the memorial table. The funeral is considered to be a “gift” for the soul of the deceased, therefore this event should not be a reason to notify friends and relatives about their own problems in life.

Signs and traditions

A huge number of customs appeared in Russia, which they adhere to today. There are various signs of what can and cannot be done before and after forty days.

There are also many superstitions associated with 40 days after the death of a loved one. Let's consider the most famous of them:

The date 40 days after the death of a person is considered very important and significant, since it is on this day, in accordance with religious canons, that the deceased will be given the final decision on his future fate and whereabouts.

Answering the question of what a date such as 40 days from the moment of death means, we note that this is a kind of line separating life on earth from eternal life in the afterlife. That is why the commemoration of a person on the fortieth day is considered the final stage of seeing off the deceased and the repose of his soul.

There are a number of specific rules according to which the relatives and friends of the deceased accompany his soul to the afterlife.

Their implementation is necessary in order for a person's transition to another world to be as painless as possible and to allow one to receive peace and eternal peace.

Until the onset of the fortieth day, tireless prayers for the deceased, memories and kind words in memory of him are very important.

Observance of the traditions of commemoration, which combine both folk and purely Orthodox customs, also plays an important role in whether the deceased will find repose.

In order to understand how to remember a person on the 40th day after death in accordance with all the rules, it is important to know what path his soul takes during this period, what happens on the 40th day after death.

From the moment of death until the onset of the fortieth day, a difficult test begins in the afterlife, during which the soul, continuing to remain on earth, gets used to existence without a body shell. Most often, this stage is more difficult to experience than the moment of dying itself.

Starting from 3-4 days after death, the soul gets used to its new state and begins to "wander" not only around the house, but also around the neighborhood of its former place of residence.

At the same time, she sees and hears everything, therefore it is undesirable for the relatives of the deceased to cry and grieve - this will bring him insurmountable suffering.

The best thing that can be done in this situation is reading prayers for the deceased and having good memories of him.

After 40 days, the soul visits the places that it loved during its earthly life for the last time. Many people who have experienced the loss of their loved ones noted that it was on this day that they had the opportunity to feel the presence of the deceased or to see him in a dream.

Thus, the last day on earth is the most important thing that happens to the human soul, the moment when it can say goodbye to earthly places and relatives. The fortieth day is considered the day of the final farewell to the deceased and his send-off to the heavenly kingdom.

For 40 days after death, mourning prohibitions are lifted for the relatives of the deceased, which have been steadily observed from the moment the person left this world.

So, for example, only after 40 days is it allowed to start arranging the grave, rearrange the furniture in the room and dispose of the belongings of the deceased.

As a rule, valuables and clothes that are in good condition are distributed to those in need, while unnecessary wardrobe items are burned.

Thus, the 40th day after death is a kind of starting point when relatives and friends come to terms with death and join the usual rhythm of life.

Depending on how exactly the soul of the deceased is escorted for 40 days, its further fate will be determined and whether it will find peace or will disturb those who did not pay due attention to the ceremony of remembrance.

Traditionally, the first association with the phrase "to remember for 40 days" suggests thoughts about a feast, at which friends and relatives of the deceased gathered.

However, it is worth remembering that the first and most important action that must be performed in order for a person's soul to find peace in heaven is prayer.

It is the prayers of those who remain on earth that can determine the future fate of the soul in the event that its path is not fully indicated.

Prayers can be both home and church. For prayer at home, it is advisable to use a prayer book or a psalter.

Important! For people who have committed suicide, memorial notes are not served. An exception is a blessing received from a priest on special occasions.

If you decide to visit the church, you can order a magpie for the deceased - then the priest and all the parishioners of the temple present at the service will pray for the repose of his soul. You can also put candles at the icon that protects the dead, having prayed while lighting a candle and asking the Lord to grant the Heavenly Kingdom to the deceased soul.

Features of commemoration for 40 days

In accordance with the canons adopted in Orthodoxy, 40 days of commemoration are held no earlier than this date (the fortieth day after the death of a person). However, life in the rhythm of the modern world is unpredictable and dictates its own conditions, and therefore, with the blessing of the priest, it is allowed to hold this ceremony a few days earlier.

Regardless of when you decide to commemorate the 40th day, the exact date itself should be honored by visiting the temple with the commemoration of prayer, as well as giving alms for the repose of those in need.

The rite of remembrance of the dead has its roots in earlier Christianity. The purpose of this ritual was to help the human soul to enter another world with peace and tranquility.

The essence of the rite has practically not changed since then: the relatives and friends of the deceased gather for 40 days after death at the memorial table, communicate, remember the good deeds of a person on earth and offer prayers for the well-being of his soul.

The closest people on this day attend a church service, where a prayer service for the repose of the soul or special prayer petitions are served.

If we talk about the differences that the procedure for carrying out the memorial rite has undergone on day 40, we can note the possibility of organizing a memorial dinner in a dining room, restaurant or cafe. This solution saves the time of those who organize the commemoration.

After all, the moral state after the funeral, as a rule, leaves much to be desired, therefore it is better to devote free time to rest and prayers for the deceased.


A memorial feast is not decisive in such a ritual as a 40-day memorial service, however, the order of its conduct necessarily includes at least a modest dinner for the relatives and close friends of the deceased.

It is highly undesirable to have a show dinner with expensive and delicious dishes.

The purpose of such a feast is not to brag about wealth and not a variety of delicacies, but to unite the relatives of the deceased to honor his memory.

Therefore, when choosing what to cook for 40 days, you should give preference to memorial dishes traditional for Slavic cuisine.

How to remember the soul of a person for 40 days at the dinner table? Mandatory elements include the following.

  1. Kutia made from rice, pearl barley, wheat with the addition of honey, poppy seeds and dried fruits. Thinking about what kutia means on the memorial table, few people know that in ancient times this dish was a symbol of resurrection, eternal life, and spiritual well-being.
  2. Borsch, broth or soup with homemade noodles (the choice of the first course usually depends on the region of residence of the deceased).
  3. Pancakes cooked in water without adding milk.
  4. Potatoes with stew with meat.
  5. Meat dish (you can limit yourself to one or two options, for example, cutlets or chicken).
  6. Fish (pickled herring or fried in batter).
  7. Fried and baked pies with meat, cabbage, potatoes, fruits.
  8. Berry or dried fruit compote.

Depending on the desire and wealth of relatives, simple snacks (cheese, sausage, pickled mushrooms and pickles, fresh vegetables) can also be added to the memorial table. As a rule, cafes and restaurants offer ready-made options for memorial menus, which you can choose as you wish.

But as for alcoholic beverages, the order of the commemoration does not imply their consumption in large quantities. It is worth remembering that a memorial dinner is not a drinking bout, but a tribute to a deceased person. For a memorial table for 40 days, it is optimal to limit yourself to dry wine and vodka.

A traditional part of the memorial dinner is giving a speech in memory of the deceased.

Everyone has the opportunity to speak out, but, as a rule, the closest relatives and friends take on this task.

What do they say in memory of a person for 40 days? Of course, only good. We are all not without sin, however, the soul of the deceased has already gone through difficult trials, and good memories of it will help to find eternal peace.

As a rule, at the commemoration they talk about the good deeds and positive qualities of the deceased, about how close and dear he was, and that he certainly deserves eternal life in the Heavenly Kingdom.

Important!If you are privileged to give a memorial speech, avoid negative judgments, gossip, and rumors about the deceased. This is far from the best option for remembering a person on day 40.

Useful video:

Let's sum up

So, we examined what the relatives of the deceased do on the 40th day after death. The ceremony of commemoration with obligatory prayers for the deceased, a prayer service in the church and a memorial dinner is traditional.

Correct observance of the traditions of commemoration will help the deceased find peace, and relatives and friends - to say goodbye to his soul.

In contact with

When close and dear people leave this life, grief and sorrow settle in the souls of their relatives. Many believe that the human spirit is immortal; after the loss of the physical body, it makes an unknown path to eternal life. But not everyone knows what happens to the soul on the 40th day after the funeral, how to behave correctly at this momentous moment for her and what words should be said. Holy Scripture says that this time is the end of the heavenly path of the deceased, and close people should help him get to heaven and find peace.

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    Where is the soul at 40 days after death

    After a long journey on day 40, the soul of the deceased goes to God's judgment. The role of her lawyer is the guardian angel who accompanied the person during his lifetime. He talks about the good deeds that the deceased managed to accomplish, and tries to mitigate the sentence.

    At the forties, the soul is allowed to go down to earth, visit native and dear places, say goodbye to the living forever. The relatives of the deceased feel his presence next to them on this day. Returning to heaven, the soul is obliged to accept the judgment rendered by the court for its deeds committed during life. They can sentence her to eternal wandering in a dark abyss or life in eternal light.

    If relatives pray on this day, then for the deceased this is the best proof of their love and care for him. In monasteries and churches in which daily services are held, the magpie is ordered - this is the daily mention of the name of the deceased for all 40 days. The words of the prayers affect the spirit like a sip of water on a hot day.

    How to properly hold a commemoration

    On the 40th day, relatives and friends of the deceased go to church. All people who come to pray must be baptized, like the deceased himself. In addition to going to the temple, you must follow the order of the commemoration:

    1. 1. Take food with you to church to be put on the memorial table. Sweets, sugar, flour, biscuits, various fruits, cereals, vegetable oils, and red wine are best. It is prohibited to bring meat, sausage, fish and other similar products to the temple.
    2. 2. Going into the church shop, you must write a note "On the repose", which indicates the name of the deceased. You need to order a prayer service in the church on the same day. All relatives who have ever passed away are registered under the name of a recently deceased person.
    3. 3. It is imperative to light a candle for peace and offer a prayer for the soul of the deceased.
    4. 4. If a service is taking place in the church at this time, it must be defended to the very end, while reading a prayer. The priest leaves the church first, and then the rest of the parishioners.
    5. 5. On the 40th day, they go to the cemetery, put flowers and light lamps on the grave. Each bouquet brought must contain an even number of flowers. They can be both live and artificial.

    The mental state of loved ones and himself depends on the number of prayers and kind words said about the deceased on this day. That is why it is important to gather the relatives and friends of a departed relative at a common memorial table on the 40th day.

    What do they do on this day

    It is assumed that the soul of the deceased comes to the house where he lived and stays there for 24 hours, after which it leaves forever. In Orthodoxy, it is generally accepted that if you do not carry it out, then it will suffer and will not be able to find peace for itself. Therefore, it is important to pay special attention to this day and do everything according to the rules.

    No matter how many conflicting opinions exist on how to celebrate this day, there are still certain rules that should be followed:

    1. 1. Pray for the deceased.This will help alleviate the fate of the soul of the deceased. It will also act as a kind of request to the Higher Powers to show their mercy and mitigate the punishment.
    2. 2. To refuse from bad habits. For the salvation of the soul, it is necessary to give up various addictions at least for a while. It is worth excluding alcohol, smoking and foul language.
    3. 3. Believe in God Sincerely... Those gathered at the table should be believers, since those who do not believe in the existence of the Lord will not be able to help the soul and mitigate its fate.
    4. 4. Behave with modesty and befitting a mournful event... Do not take a memorial dinner as an opportunity to meet friends and family. It is forbidden to sing, drink alcohol, and have fun.
    5. 5. Dress in dark colors... Also, for all 40 days, you need to look strict and wear a mourning outfit. He will help refrain from worldly vanity and hysterics.

    What is cooked for a memorial dinner

    Cooking the right meal is just as important as going to church and reading prayers. At the table, kind owls commemorate the deceased, thereby helping his soul to rest. Food is not the main component at the commemoration, so you should refrain from culinary delights. To properly set the funeral table, you need to know a few simple but important rules:

    1. 1. There must be kutia on the memorial table. According to custom, the dish is prepared from rice or millet. It symbolizes the frailty of the world and carries a sacred meaning. It is allowed to replace it with pancakes without filling.
    2. 2. It is best to drink food with jelly, bread kvass, berry fruit drinks, lemonade or sbitn.
    3. 3. It is recommended to bake special funeral pies with various fillings.
    4. 4. If relatives decide to cook meat dishes, then they should be simple. They make stuffed cabbage rolls, cutlets, goulash. You can also put fish on the table. It must be remembered that on the days of fasting it is allowed to cook only lean meals.
    5. 5. Salads are made entirely from lean ingredients. You can fill them only with simple fillings; you should not use mayonnaise and various fatty sauces.
    6. 6. It is imperative to put the deceased's favorite food on the table.
    7. 7. Plain cheesecakes, biscuits and sweets can be used as desserts.

    Whom to invite to the commemoration

    On the 40th day after death, relatives, friends and acquaintances gather at the deceased's house at the memorial table. They accompany the soul of the deceased and honor his memory with kind words, recalling all the bright and most significant moments of his worldly life.

    It is necessary to invite to the commemoration not only close people, but also his colleagues, students, mentors. It doesn't matter who exactly comes to dinner, it is important that the person treats the deceased with respect.

    How and what they say for 40 days

    At the table, it is customary to remember not only a recently departed person, but also all relatives who have died. The deceased should be treated as if he were at dinner. It is only necessary to make a speech while standing. Christians should honor the memory of a person with a minute of silence.

    Before the commemoration or immediately after them, one must turn to the Lord. You can speak in your own words or read a prayer to Saint Uar. This will be a petition from loved ones that the Almighty give the soul of the deceased freedom from eternal torment.

    In order for the commemoration to go well, you can appoint a presenter. A friend or closest relative can act in his capacity. It is important that a person knows how to keep his emotions to himself and be able to prevent clutter at the table. It is necessary that all those present make a memorial speech.

    The moderator should have prepared phrases that will help defuse the situation if someone's words cause strong emotions in the audience. Also, with these phrases, you can make up for the pause that may arise due to the tears of the speaker.

    The facilitator also has other responsibilities:

    • make sure that the words are said by everyone who wishes;
    • keep others from gossip and prevent quarrels;
    • interrupt the commemoration at the moment when those gathered will stop talking about the deceased and begin to discuss everyday problems.

    At the memorial table, one cannot report other relatives' illnesses, discuss the inheritance, the personal life of those present. A commemoration is a gift for the soul of the deceased, which helps to pass the tests and find peace.

    Alms and alms

    According to the Orthodox faith, on the fortieth day after the Assumption, it is customary to sort out the belongings of the departed and take them to church. They can also be distributed to people in need who live nearby. It is imperative to ask that those who receive alms pray for the soul of the deceased, asking the Lord to give him eternal light.

    This ritual is considered a good deed that helps a deceased person and is counted in his favor at the trial. Relatives can keep some things for themselves that are especially dear and memorable. It is impossible to take out the property of the deceased in the trash.

    The church advises giving alms to people. They will remember the deceased with a kind word and pray for him. It is allowed to give beggars and children various pastries, sweets, fruits.

    Is it possible to celebrate the commemoration earlier

    The soul begins to wander between the worlds on the day of death. Her ordeals end on the fortieth day, when the decision of God's court on her future fate is made. This is the most important day when it is necessary to pray and remember the positive moments from the life of the deceased.

    The deceased is remembered for all 40 days, therefore, the commemoration of the fortieth day can be collected ahead of time. If it is not possible to invite relatives on this day, then the relatives must go to church and order a memorial prayer for the deceased.

    The meal itself does not play any role in the future fate of the soul. It is not the abundance of dishes on the table that is important, but attention, memories of loving people and prayers. It is forbidden to transfer the commemoration to the cemetery or the requiem.

    What to do if 40 days falls on Lent

    Lent is the main and strictest of all Christian fasts. Remembering deceased relatives during his period is allowed only on special days. These are the second, third and fourth.If the commemoration fell on an ordinary day of Great Lent, then they should be postponed to the next Saturday or Sunday.

    It is also allowed to commemorate the dead on Annunciation, Thursday and Saturday during Holy Week. At this time, you can submit a note "On the repose" and order a liturgy. The best way to learn about the possibility of holding a memorial dinner on a specific day is in the church.

    If the 40th day of death falls on the most severe weeks of Great Lent, then only the closest relatives are allowed to be invited to dinner. Do not forget about prayers for peace and do good deeds for the peace of the soul of the deceased, and also give alms as on ordinary days.

    The family of a deceased person is not prohibited from gathering at the memorial table. But it is worth remembering that according to the rules of Great Lent, fish can be eaten only on Annunciation and Palm Sunday. Flavoring food with vegetable oils is possible only on weekends and on the days of the memory of saints.

    If among those invited there are people who strictly observe the rules of Great Lent, then you need to prepare special treats for them. The purpose of the meal is to strengthen the strength of the people to pray.

    According to tradition, the lean table should contain pickles, sauerkraut, peas, potatoes, various cereals on the water, raisins, and nuts. You can treat those present with bagels, bagels and other lean pastries.

    Who shouldn't be remembered

    There are people for whom the church does not hold memorial services and forbids them to be commemorated. If a person has decided to neglect God's gift and commit suicide, then it is impossible to collect a commemoration for him. For such deceased, you can pray and give alms. Also, they do not serve the funeral service for persons who left this world while in a state of drug or alcohol intoxication.

    It is best not to arrange a commemoration for dead babies. It is worth going to church and praying for his soul. It is generally accepted that in this way the Lord is trying to save a newborn from a difficult fate in the future. The parents of the deceased child can only accept his will and pray tirelessly for their baby.

    Signs and traditions

    Even in Ancient Russia, there were rituals and traditions, which they tried to adhere to for 40 days after the death of a relative. Some of them have survived to this day. The most famous of them:

    • forty days after the death of a person, it is forbidden to cut hair and wash clothes;
    • the table for the memorial dinner is set, excluding sharp utensils, and the spoons are placed on a napkin with the back side up;
    • you cannot sweep the crumbs from the memorial table and throw them away, they are collected and taken to the grave of the deceased, so that he knows that he is remembered;
    • it is not prohibited to bring your own food to the guests;
    • at night, you need to close windows and doors, you cannot cry at this time, since the tears of relatives can attract the spirit of a dead man and prevent him from leaving for another world.

    Also, many superstitions have come down to our times, which are observed up to 40 days after the death of a person. So, at this time, you cannot turn on the light in the apartment and direct cleaning in it, you can burn candles or light a dim night light. You can't go to bed in the place of the deceased either. All reflective surfaces in the house of the deceased must be covered with a dense cloth, otherwise the soul can be reflected in them and take a living person with it.

    When laying the memorial table, it is imperative to put the device for the deceased, put food on a plate and pour drink into a glass. During this time, the widow is obliged to walk in a black scarf, otherwise she may damage herself. On the windowsill, you should put a towel and put water so that, coming into the house, the soul of the deceased can wash and put itself in order.

    It is allowed to commemorate another person who has gone into the world when relatives need it. Carrying out a commemoration for the forties, it is imperative to follow the rules and do it without flaws. Only prayers, kind words and deeds will help the soul find peace.

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After his death. Many religions claim that the spirit is eternal and invisible. In Christianity, important dates are 3 days, 9 days, 40 days after death. They carry a certain sacred meaning.

After leaving the body, the soul for 40 days after death is still closely connected with the world of the living. It often happens that even after the funeral of the deceased, an invisible presence is felt in the house. The custom of covering mirrors is also associated with this, since the absence of one's own reflection has a strong effect on the soul. Some beliefs claim that she may even get lost in them. Therefore, in the period 40 days after death, the mirrors in the house of the deceased must be hung. In Christianity, this custom is considered a superstition.

According to Orthodoxy, the soul of a deceased person enjoys almost complete freedom for the first three days. She retains knowledge from her earthly life, as well as many feelings: attachments, fears, hopes, feelings of shame and the desire to finish unfinished business. At this time, the soul of its own free will can be where it wants.

It is believed that for the first three days the spirit is next to the body or close people, or in places that were dear and important for a person during life. That is why one should not arrange very big tantrums and shed many tears. After all, the soul has not yet got used to its new plan of existence, and the additional psychological burden from inconsolable relatives will only aggravate its condition. After this period, the spirit loses its freedom and is taken by the angels to the higher planes of being. Therefore, on day 3, it is necessary to hold a memorial service.

Further, the soul is shown what is considered to be paradise, so that it gets an idea of \u200b\u200bit. She also meets with God and with the souls of the saints and the righteous. Here the spirit begins its first torments due to the fear of not getting to the higher planes of being. This trip lasts six days. Therefore, on the ninth day, a memorial service is also ordered and a commemoration is held.

Further ordeals begin. They represent trials and obstacles in which nothing depends on the spirit itself. In the period 40 days after death, it is determined whether the soul of a person will be in hell or in paradise before the onset of the Last Judgment, where the final decision on its fate will be made.

During ordeals, the ratio of positive and negative actions, words and even thoughts during earthly existence is measured. After his death, a person is no longer able to influence them. Ordeals are in essence judicial debates between angels and demons, acting, respectively, as lawyers and accusers of a person.

The period of 40 days after death is also important because after going through the ordeal, the soul descends to the lower planes of being, or to hell. There she is shown the various horrors and torments of sinners. At the end of the forty-day period, the spirit again appears before God, who decides his fate until the Last Judgment. Therefore, after 40 days after death, commemoration and funeral service are also held, as well as after three and nine days. The fortieth day is perceived by Christianity and other religions as a key milestone for the soul, after which it finally loses its connection with the world of the living.