Is it possible to get a divorce if there was a wedding. Wedding and divorce What will happen if the married divorced

Is it possible to get a divorce after marriage?

During the registration process, the newlyweds do not just register their relationship and formalize it - they also seal their love in front of the entire state. And those who get married in a church strengthen and confirm their love before God.

Therefore, entering into both a church and an ordinary, secular marriage, the newlyweds promise to share joys and sorrows together, as well as to live together amicably and well, regardless of financial situation. However, not every union of a man and a woman stands the test of years and time.

Divorce for those who got married

Approximately half of the married couples registered in Russia eventually break up some time after the start of official marriage relations. Couples go to the registry office, get divorced, and, in most cases, they stop there. They comply with all the current conditions for a divorce, because it is precisely such a divorce, a state one, that will be enough to end official relations.

However, few people think that it is necessary not just to get a divorce: if there was a wedding, you need to remember this and know how to get a divorce correctly.

The thing is that for believing citizens who got married, the divorce does not end in the registry office in full. They will all also be married, but already before God, and this will be until such time as they are not dethroned.

How to get divorced

It should immediately be taken into account that the church is very negative about any kind of divorce, officially considering that the break in relations between husband and wife harms not only the spouses themselves, but also the children of these spouses.

Now qualified lawyers, as well as church service workers, are meeting, but several centuries ago even those who are relative to the representatives of the royal family did not have the right to disperse. Today the situation has changed, but it is recommended to contact a qualified lawyer to confirm the reason for the divorce and debunking.

Debunking: conditions for divorce and the main reasons for getting divorced

treason;
Any vices that are or may be recognized as unnatural;
The entry of a spouse into marital relations with another person;
The refusal of one of the spouses from their faith;
Absence of a spouse for more than three years;
Failure by one of the legal spouses to fulfill his marital obligations due to causing various physical damage to himself;
Physical assault or any other form of harm to a spouse or children;
The presence of any mental illness in one of the spouses, if these diseases cannot be cured;
Disease of a venereal nature;
The passion of the spouse for drugs, as well as alcohol, or for any other habits that adversely affect the spouse;
Keeping a spouse in prison;
Use of the inferior physical condition of the spouse for personal / own benefit;
Abortion without husband's consent.

How do they get divorced when there was a wedding

Many people have a question: how is it right and in general is it possible for a married couple to divorce if there was a wedding

In order to officially divorce not just as citizens, but also as citizens who got married and testified their relationship before God, it is necessary to first formalize the divorce in the registry office. After that, it is necessary to apply with a corresponding request to the church in order for the debunking procedure to be carried out there.

It is recommended to carry out this procedure at the time of arrival, and it will be correct if both spouses come to the parish. It is necessary to write an appropriate petition for debunking, and send this petition to the name of the diocesan bishop. It should be noted that even one spouse can submit this application.

It is extremely important to draw up the documents correctly, and this is where divorce legal advice comes in handy. The petition must specify in detail and truthfully all the reasons according to which the divorce was inevitable.

The marriage will be annulled if the clergyman himself considers the reasons for its termination valid.

In addition to the petition, the spouses also need to take some documents with them to the church:

Marriage certificate of the spouses;
Documents proving the identity of the applicants;
Documents that confirm the official, that is, the legal termination of the marriage between the spouses;
In cases where the main reason for the divorce is the illness of the spouse or his long-term imprisonment, these documents must also be attached as evidence. These may be documents of a medical examination or examination, as well as documents from the materials of a criminal case against one of the spouses.

It should be noted that if the debunking occurs through the fault of one person, the church allows him to get married again, although it does so very reluctantly. Therefore, it is recommended not to bring the case to a debunking, or to seek the help of a qualified lawyer to properly conduct a divorce case.

Recently, getting married has become fashionable - it's beautiful and looks serious and significant. However, the divorce rate is growing every year. In our forum, disputes on the topic " Why get married". We decided to try to understand a little about marriage, weddings and divorce.

What do you need for a wedding

First you need to establish what types of marriages exist. The union of a man and a woman can be secular (marriage registered in the registry office), church (wedding) or actual (the so-called cohabitation). For the wedding to be valid, the spouses must meet several conditions:

Church marriage is impossible without civil marriage. Only legal spouses are crowned: before the ceremony, you must present a state marriage certificate.
Spouses must be of equal faith and baptized. The same religion is a necessary condition. In other words, only a Christian couple can be married in the ROC.

Divorce: church and legal

Love is not only a great happiness, but also a serious work. Unfortunately, not everyone can handle it. When married spouses decide to divorce, a natural question arises about church divorce.

There are couples who, having filed a legal divorce, forget about the church. From the point of view of the state and law, a secular divorce is enough: after it, a person is officially recognized as free, even if the church marriage is not dissolved. However, true believers (does it make sense to get married to those who are not among them?) This problem cannot but excite.

The attitude of the church towards divorce

Of course, the Russian Orthodox Church stands for the eternal fidelity of spouses and the indissolubility of both church and secular marriage. The Church does not officially recognize divorce and does not provide for "debunking". Spouses are given to each other for mutual correction and therefore a change of partner is not expected.

History reference

For centuries, men have had more rights and opportunities to end church marriages. For example, the church treated and treats the betrayal of the husband quite loyally, while the betrayal of the wife is the basis for the dissolution of the marriage.

Thus, there are certain reasons due to which a church divorce can still be obtained. In the history of our state, there were rulers who, for the sake of divorce and remarriage, declared their wives crazy, exiled them to a monastery, or executed them for adultery.

In England, King Henry VIII became famous for separating the church from the Vatican and himself becoming the head of the Anglican Church in order to be able to marry again. And many more times.

For ordinary citizens, getting a divorce was more difficult. It is known that Jupiter is allowed - the bull is not allowed. The reasons for divorce could be fornication or the tonsure of one of the spouses (often forced). However, if the wife is a witch, this could not serve as a reason for divorce. Such a wife had to be re-educated and punished.

The charter on the church courts of Yaroslav (church court code of the 13th-14th centuries) read:

“If the wife is a sorceress, a prisoner, or a sorcerer, or a greengrocer, the husband, having convicted, will punish her, but will not divorce.”

However, the world does not stand still, the modern way of life affects even the conservatism of the church. The Catholic Church held on the longest, in which divorce (including secular) was considered impossible. In Italy, the cult of the family is so strong that the harsh law prohibiting divorce gave rise to conflicts of law in mixed marriages with citizens of other states.

Only since 1972 did Catholicism make concessions and allow divorce. However, in order to get a divorce in Italy, there are still certain difficulties and it is necessary to live separately (separacien) for 3 years while being married - an intermediate stage of divorce.

Grounds for church divorce

In order to divorce married spouses, the church must be presented with a fairly good reason.

Reasons for divorce recognized by the ROC:

How to get a church divorce

To obtain a church divorce, you must submit a petition addressed to the diocesan bishop to the diocesan administration. This can be done in your parish: the appeal will be submitted to the Bishop for consideration. By the way, one of the spouses can file for divorce if he has the above reasons.

The petition must briefly state the history of the marriage, indicate the place and time of the wedding, and indicate the reasons for the divorce. Copies of civil divorce documents are attached to the letter. Each request is considered on an individual basis. If Vladyka considers the reason for divorce significant and sees no canonical obstacles to a new marriage, a blessing will be given to the former spouses.

Is it possible to get married again

In Orthodoxy, a second wedding is permissible out of "indulgence for human infirmities." In the event that one of the spouses is married for the first time, the ceremony takes place as for the first time. A person guilty of the dissolution of the first church marriage does not have the right to enter into a second one. And the third marriage in any case is an extreme concession to the church and is allowed only in order to prevent the sin of adultery. The ROC categorically does not allow more than three church marriages.

A thoughtful attitude to the very sacrament of church marriage will help to avoid the painful procedure of a church divorce. Alas, it is not uncommon for people to get married just because it is unusual, beautiful and romantic. Is it any wonder that such couples do not value not only a blessing from above, but also fidelity in a relationship?

In order to somehow try to insure yourself against a church divorce, you should not run to church immediately after the registry office. Live a few years in a legal marriage and make sure of your feelings in order to secure them before God with all responsibility. Also, it is worth at least a little to go to church and find out what, in addition to the beauty of the wedding ceremony, church marriage implies, what rights, obligations and consequences.

We live in a time of global impoverishment of love, faith and patience, when family values are no longer perceived by a modern corrupt person as an absolute and inviolable shrine. Unfortunately, not everything is so smooth in the homes of believers. Recently, we have periodically heard that another couple married in the temple has divorced.

Through the efforts of our author Maria Sarajishvili, we have collected 5 such stories and asked another permanent author of the portal, priest Pavel Gumerov, to comment on them.

Maria Sarajishvili
FIVE SAD STORIES

“All happy families are alike,
every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."

L.N. Tolstoy

Instead of a preface

Angela (Moscow): “... Before the second wedding, they simply read some kind of permissive prayer to my mother. And on the same day she married her second husband.

Before it was believed that once they got married, then everything, there is no going back

Simple and easy. Twenty years ago, it was believed that getting a church one was the most difficult thing, impossible without special reasons. Few of the parishioners really knew these reasons, and it was believed that once they got married, then that was it, there was no turning back.

And the real reasons for the dissolution of a church marriage were as follows. According to According to the definition of the Local Council of 1917-1918, the reasons for divorce in the Russian Orthodox Church may be:

Falling away from Orthodoxy (the right to ask the court for a divorce belongs to the spouse who remains in Orthodoxy).
Adultery and unnatural vices.
Inability to marital cohabitation (if it began before marriage and is not due to advanced age; the case is initiated no earlier than two years from the date of the marriage; if the inability was the result of intentional bodily harm after the marriage, divorce is allowed).
Disease of leprosy or syphilis.
Unknown absence (at least three years; two years - if the missing spouse was at war or sailed on a ship).
The award of one of the spouses to punishment, combined with the deprivation of all rights of the state.
Encroachment on the life and health of a spouse or children (causing severe mutilation, or severe, life-threatening beatings, or harm important to health).
Dreaming, pandering and profiting from the indecency of a spouse.
The entry of one of the spouses into a new marriage.
An incurable severe mental illness that eliminates the possibility of continuing married life.
Malicious abandonment of a spouse by another spouse if it makes it impossible to continue married life.

According to the Fundamentals of the Social Concept of the Russian Orthodox Church, “at present, this list of grounds for divorce is supplemented by such reasons as AIDS, medically evidenced chronic alcoholism or drug addiction, abortion by a wife with her husband’s disagreement” (Article 10.3).

Now life has become faster, and people are much more informed than before. And the situation with divorces has become much simpler.

Before me is a typographical form with the following content: “Such and such (F.I. entered by hand) gives consent to such and such (F.I. in words) to marry a second time.” This is church divorce. Under the short lines there is a place for a signature and a date. The form does not say anything about children and the fulfillment of paternal responsibilities. Then the interested party must take the wedding certificate and this receipt to the Patriarchy. There they will put a seal, the papers will be handed over to the archive, and the union consecrated by God will be considered terminated. A permissive prayer will be read over those who wish to enter into a second marriage. And you can immediately get married a second time.

The Constitution of Georgia recognizes a church wedding, but in the event of a divorce, only those who were officially married have the right to divide property. Children born in a church marriage without official registration receive the mother's surname and have no right to the father's property, unless he himself wishes it.

Apparently, church divorces today have reached such a number that the Patriarchate was forced to prepare the appropriate forms. What can you do, divorce is the spirit of the times.

Every day a video is broadcast on TV with the call: “Fathers, remember your children!” Then there are dry lines of statistics for Georgia: "Every third father does not pay child support, every fifth is wanted." This is only official data, and, as you know, many couples break up before they reach the registry office. Moreover, all this is happening against the background of the fact that, as Archpriest George (Doreuli) says, “today, nine out of ten people will say that they have their confessor, and churches and monasteries do not accommodate believers on holidays” (Karibche Magazine No. 6, 2011 .).

Why there is now a pan-epidemic of divorces in the world, quite a lot has been written. It is more interesting to analyze the divorces of church people, initially armed with the teachings of the Holy Fathers on how to deal with passions and rebellious flesh.

Story one

When 18-year-old Tengo and 32-year-old Eka - neighbors on the landing - began to travel to holy places, their mothers were only happy. Together it is not dangerous and spiritually useful. Pilgrims returned home with enthusiastic stories. In Mtskheta we met an old man, in Shiomgvime we met a young monk, and so on… We traveled, of course, taking a blessing from our confessors.

The pilgrims confronted their parents with a fact: “We have just arrived from Svetitskhoveli. They got married there. We'll have a baby soon."

One fine day, the pilgrims confronted their parents with a fact: “We have just arrived from Svetitskhoveli. They got married there. We'll have a baby soon."

It's easy to imagine what started here! Both mothers began to accuse the opposite side of seducing their child.

They shouted, made some noise, then resigned. Eka went to live with Tengo as a legal wife. Soon a boy was born. After forty days, guests began to come with congratulations. Tengo's friends sympathized with him from the bottom of their hearts.

You are gone, brother.

“Look at you and her...

And all in the same spirit.

And the difference was really striking. Tall, athletically built Tengo with the face of a movie actor and next to him is a short, fat Eka with the most ordinary appearance.

Water, as you know, wears away stone. Tengo, nervous, left home. He began to temporarily live with a friend. Eka had to return to her room, to the apartment opposite, to her original position. The marriage fell apart...

Tengo has been living in Russia for a long time, he is successfully married and has children. Eka lives in the same building. Collides on the stairs with the former mother-in-law. The son is finishing school. Grandmother helps her grandson. Still, native blood...

Story two

After the wedding, Koba and Tekle, glowing with joy, publicly shared their plans with congratulators.

We want to have a true Christian marriage. We will give birth as much as God will give.

The parishioners nodded approvingly, exchanging remarks about the external resemblance of the newlyweds.

- They look good together.

Koba is a serious guy. What life school passed! He will make a good father.

Koba is a refugee from Abkhazia, who managed to take a sip of the war, and, indeed, an enviable groom. He started a business in Tbilisi from scratch, opened a sports section for boys, bought an apartment, and now he decided to get married. And most importantly, an active believer. Every Sunday he brings all his wards to the service, and they, kneeling, chant in chorus “Mamao chveno” ( "Our Father" in Georgian - Note. ed. ), so much so that the glass trembles. Strict with boys, but fair. They listen to him from half a word.

Tekle is a humble woman, you won’t hear an extra word. Like a shadow follows his bearded stern husband.

And the general parish opinion delivered an encouraging verdict.

- They will all be fine.

A year later, they had a boy. Then - the second. Koba every Sunday, hand in hand with his wife, brought the little ones to the Chalice. He also served as needed. A year later, a daughter was born. Outwardly, everything was the same. Only Tekle had a haggard, disconnected look. One servant of God, glancing askance at the family, remarked:

- Tekle, apparently, has reached the handle. Every year to give birth, what body can withstand? Where are Koba's eyes? You have to give people a rest.

Koba at that moment was scolding in rather harsh terms some boy who casually crossed himself at the entrance to the church.

“It must be hard to live with him,” the observer continued. - Commanding in the army is good, but in the family the main thing is compromise.

Another year has passed. Koba had a fourth child. Everything went on as usual. Then suddenly there was a rumor: they dispersed. No one really knew the reason, only speculation. All four children stayed with their father.

This news gave rise to a lot of gossip, the general meaning of which was in one phrase: “And what did she lack?” The question remained unanswered. This was followed by a church divorce in the Patriarchate in accordance with all the rules.

This was about 10 years ago. Koba is still on the altar. His children have grown up. The second time he did not marry. What happened to Tekle is unknown. She never showed up at church again.

Story three

To Kostya, who had just been released from prison, the attitude in the parish was in advance condescending and compassionate: “Who does not happen to?” He was perceived not just as Kostya, but, first of all, as the son of the singer Irina. Sociable, cheerful, despite her lameness, she went to services from Rustavi. If only, as she said, "to sing to the Lord." With all this, Irina was an Orthodox walking encyclopedia. She lived on a pension of 14 lari (it was under Shevardnadze) and alms collected in her mug.

Good news soon spread: Kostya was getting married on Sunday. Irina did not get tired of telling the details to all the empathizers.

The bride's confessor refuses to marry them. He says that Kostya was in prison, but now he is without work and without a home. Let life get better first, then get married

- ... So lucky, so lucky! God sent a believing girl! It must have been our fathers who begged me for consolation. ... They fell in love with each other at first sight. Only here is the problem: her confessor refuses to marry them. He says that Kostya was imprisoned several times, and now he is without work and without a home. Let her life get better first, then get married. And who has it, this job? Such unemployed people are now half of Georgia. In general, not seeing, disliked my son. Forgive him, Lord! Priests also make mistakes. My boy has a heart of gold. He loves her two daughters like his own.

The listeners sighed sympathetically and offered their options.

As a result, they decided to get married with another priest and start a new life in the newlywed's territory.

After the wedding, Kostya and Lena laid a small table for several parishioners to celebrate a significant day. At first, they went to services together. Then more apart. This didn't surprise anyone either. Lena has a rotating schedule - cleaning "when called." Kostya seems to have settled down to sell icons. Something went wrong with his work. Dropped one, took on another. And in the end it turned out that Lena hung around her neck.

Six months later, they parted and did not appear in the church again.

Story four

Lyudmila (Moscow):

- I got married twice. I think that there can be no divorce, and now I have two husbands. And then God will ask for both. I returned to my first husband after 15 years. This did not bring me female happiness. And it is not known what else will end. A wedding is not only a rite, but also a Sacrament. It cannot be removed by someone else's signature. And, like baptism, it is not retroactive. The second wedding is like a second baptism - only an extra cross. So it turns out that I'm a whore.

I struggle with my man-hatred in every possible way. Yes, they are all selfish. The time is now. But we must not insult them even in our thoughts. Otherwise, my son will be insulted by my daughter-in-law. And I don't want that...

Story five

Here is another program from the "Ex-wives Club" series with a story on the same topic.

40-year-old Nugzar, who lived in a monastery for five years, returned to the world. Soon he met 38-year-old Inga. The mutual sympathy that arose between them was so strong that both at the first meeting began to tell each other their past lives. There was a lot in common: the first unsuccessful marriage, disappointment in people and a timid hope for a better future.

Inga Nugzar conquered with his churchness and knowledge of the Holy Fathers. This quality played a decisive role, and after the third date they decided to get married. Inga was not embarrassed that Nugzar did not have his own apartment, that he lived with his aunt with his mother. Material wealth is a matter of gain, the main thing is the person himself. After the wedding, they sold Inga's apartment in Tbilisi and bought a house in the village, which the head of the family immediately took over. Which also did not arouse Inga's suspicions, but how could it be otherwise? Soon scandals, jealousy, Nugzar's drunkenness and, as a result, beatings began. Inga endured, hoping that the birth of the expected child would change everything. Alas, little Barbara only worsened the situation, adding material problems to non-working parents. The situation escalated to the limit, and Inga and her child had to go to a shelter for victims of family troubles and from there to fight for their rights. Nugzar and his mother remained in the won living space, not at all caring about the fate of their own daughter and granddaughter.

And there are many such stories.

And again statistics. Every year, 3,900 children in Georgia are discharged from maternity hospitals with their mother's last name. A law has recently been passed to protect the interests of such children born in unregistered marriages. Now a woman has the right through the court to demand the establishment of paternity, and then the payment of alimony if the DNA test turns out to be positive. The cost of the analysis (2000 GEL) in case of confirmation of paternity must be paid by the accused party. But the law does not cover cases where the father is chronically unemployed and has no real estate. And there are many of them too.

Maybe it's worth giving some kind of trial period to those who want to get married, something like a few months, so that people can decide how serious this relationship is. And in a church divorce, the problems of each married couple should be considered in detail.

COMMENTARY BY PRIEST PAVEL GUMEROV,
temple under construction
in honor of Saints Peter and Fevronia of Murom in Maryino,
author of many books and articles on family life and parenting

All the above facts and stories in the material are very sad and are an illustration of the words of the Savior: “Because of the increase of iniquity, the love of many will grow cold” (Matthew 24:12).

On the topic of divorces in the church environment, I have repeatedly spoken out, including on the pages of the portal, so I apologize in advance if I repeat myself. The author of the material on divorces (as well as all of us, by the way) is very concerned that Orthodox families, which 25 years ago were an example of strength and marital harmony, are now also undergoing a considerable crisis. I didn’t even imagine that in Georgia, a country where there have always been strong family foundations and values, everything is also very unfavorable. Both the Russian Federation and Georgia were once part of a single great country, where, despite an atheistic upbringing, people understood that the family is a great value, it must be created with all responsibility and cherished throughout life. The state also pursued a pro-family policy. Family values were promoted, the family was given support and assistance. Divorce, on the contrary, was condemned. If people did get divorced, it was printed in the newspaper, they could have trouble at work, and, in general, most of society condemned divorce.

It is very difficult for young people whose childhood fell on a period of timelessness to build a family

What happened after, we all know very well. State, family, moral foundations collapsed. Both here and in Georgia. The state was not up to the family. People have ceased to see the highest value in the family. All this was aggravated by complete permissiveness and moral degradation. What was shown on TV, what was sold in stalls, what songs they listened to, what films they watched and shot in the 90s, everyone also remembers. The number of divorces, broken families, homeless children - just rolled over. But the saddest thing is that it is very difficult for young people whose childhood and adolescence fell on a period of timelessness to create and build their own family. Most of them grew up in incomplete families (in complete families, parents also had no time for raising children, it was necessary to simply survive), the children tasted the poisonous fruits of debauchery and depravity very early. They saw very few examples of happy, strong families. Many, in general, have lost faith that family happiness is possible. Many have a delusion that you can live without a family. The rampant fashion was established just then.

Orthodox children and adolescents, of course, have also been affected by this problem. Moreover, they do not live in isolation: everyone has a TV, radio, and the Internet. Therefore, conflicts, family crises and divorces also occur in Orthodox families. But not because Christian family and moral values are outdated and no longer work, but because we have changed. We succumbed to the spirit of the times, we do not want to work on ourselves, we are working on our family life. If the Church simply tightens the measures and makes church divorce a very difficult act, I think it will not work. Christian marriage (both now and in pre-revolutionary times) has two sides: spiritual and civil, legal. One does not exist without the other. Before the revolution, marriages and divorces were handled by the Church. Now it's a state. We cannot help but give a man a divorce if his marriage, both de facto and de jure, no longer exists. Yes, there are countries, such as Italy, where it is very difficult to get a church divorce, but it is very difficult to get a secular divorce there. Divorce proceedings there sometimes go on for 5, 10 years.

I believe that for a Christian not to keep an unmarried marriage is the same sin as to terminate a union blessed in the church. After all, now a whole category of Orthodox people has appeared who, having registered a marriage, are in no hurry to get married. They live, as it were, in a trial marriage, they think that if they divorce now, they will commit a lesser sin than if they part after the wedding. And, of course, such half-hearted, insincere relationships do not add strength to their union. All this is complete hypocrisy. After all, when canons and rules about marriage were written, when families were created in pre-revolutionary Russia, they could not be anything other than married ones.

Male infantilism, irresponsibility - an alarming symptom of our time

Now a little about the specific examples given in this material. Of course, based on such brief information it is difficult to draw any conclusions, but you can pay attention to a few points. Some of the guys in the above stories married (or wanted to marry) women much older than themselves. Some did not want to work and feed their families. This is a very bright and characteristic touch. Male infantilism, irresponsibility is an alarming symptom of our time. A huge number of young people were brought up by single mothers, who often fed them, watered them, pampered them, and solved all their problems for them. Often such a young man then looks for a new "mommy", sometimes older than himself. In his mother's family, he not only did not see a working man, but he himself was often relieved of all labor loads. It is quite natural that this continues in the already new, own family.

Women have lost their shame and dignity, they have become very accessible. And it also destroys the family

Another reason for the fragility of modern, even church marriages is that the future spouses begin the creation of a family with a very serious mistake, they commit a big sin when they begin to live a carnal life together even before marriage. Remember, in the first story: Tengo and Eka came from a trip and confronted their parents with the fact that they got married and were expecting a baby soon. That is, as they say, married in pursuit. It will be very difficult for a person who allows himself fornication before marriage to remain faithful to his soul mate. This is a common problem, not just for men. Women have lost their shame and dignity, they have become very accessible. And it also destroys the family and pushes young people into sins before marriage and adultery in family life.

But still, in conclusion, I would like to say that despite the frequent examples of all kinds of family problems and even divorces, including those listed here, the situation in church families is much better than in others. I was often approached by different people and different couples in difficult family situations. So, in the vast majority of cases, these were non-church people, or little church people. Yes, and Orthodox families are overwhelmed by the waves of the sea of life, yes, and they are being sucked in by the spirit of this age. But this does not mean that the modern Orthodox family is no longer different from the non-church family.

For the sake of objectivity, let's turn to statistics. In Russia, more than 50 divorces are registered for every 100 marriages. 80% of husbands, at least sometimes, but cheat on their wives, 40% of children are born outside the family, more than 5 thousand mothers every year abandon their children in maternity hospitals, more than 4 million are made annually. Do you think all this is said about Orthodox, church-going people?

I think that we, modern Christians, in spite of any pressure and pernicious influence from outside, need to constantly remember: who we are and what the Lord expects from us. Much has been given to us, but much will be required of us. It is necessary not to succumb to passions, not to justify ourselves by the fact that we live, they say, in a difficult, corrupted time. And at what time, tell me, did the first Christians live, did the martyrs of the first three centuries live? They kept their faith and morality!

The most important thing is not to be lukewarm and lazy, then everything will work out and succeed, with the help of God, to improve your family life and find family happiness.

Deeply believing Christians get divorced extremely rarely. Most often it happens to people who do not fully understand the meaning of the sacrament of marriage, perceiving the wedding simply as a beautiful ceremony or some kind of magical act designed to ensure a happy married life “automatically”, without the efforts of the husband and wife. With such psychological attitudes, divorce can be considered a pattern rather than an exception.

Some priests advise young people not to rush to get married or even refuse to get married until the spouses have been married for at least a year. Unfortunately, these precautions do not always reach their goal, and church divorce becomes the same everyday reality as secular divorce. There is no special ceremony for "debunking". From the point of view of the Church, the dissolution of a marriage is not so much an act as an acknowledgment of a fait accompli.

Unlike a secular marriage, such common reasons as “dissimilarity of characters”, “lack of common interests”, “sexual dissatisfaction” cannot be grounds for dissolution of a church marriage. The essence of such reasons is the same: the spouses have ceased to enjoy life together. From the point of view of the Christian faith, marriage is not a source of pleasure, but a "school" of love, patience and humility, therefore, the lack of pleasure is not a reason to dissolve a marriage.

However, the Church recognizes that, under certain circumstances, the preservation of a marriage is not possible. A church marriage can be dissolved if one of the spouses is convicted of adultery, abandoned the family or entered into a new marriage, renounced the Orthodox faith, or was sentenced to imprisonment. Divorce is permissible if the behavior of one of the spouses endangers the life and health of the other, as well as children. It is not forbidden to divorce an alcoholic or drug addict. You can dissolve a church marriage if the spouse has been missing for a long time, and the search does not bring results.

There are also medical indications for the dissolution of a church marriage: severe mental disorders, AIDS, syphilis, leprosy. Inability to intimacy for health reasons can also be grounds for divorce, but only on condition that the person hid this fact when entering into marriage or purposefully inflicted appropriate injuries on himself. If a person falls ill after marriage and as a result loses the ability to perform marital duties, this is regarded as a test that the other spouse must accept with humility.

The husband has the right to demand a church divorce if the wife had an abortion without his consent.

If one of these reasons exists, either both spouses or one of them - the one who is the "injured party" - can apply for a divorce. The petition is submitted to the diocesan administration in the name of the ruling bishop, it can be submitted through the rector of the temple. If the bishop considers the reasons indicated in the petition to be sufficient grounds for a divorce, the former spouses may receive a blessing to enter into a new marriage.

Linking your life with your soulmate, any of us is sure that this is forever. But it also happens that in life everything does not turn out the way we want. Often, not so long ago, hearts that strongly love each other, who swore an oath of allegiance to God, now diverge in different directions, becoming completely alien. What to do in such a situation? Is it possible to carry out the debunking of a church marriage or a church divorce? Is it possible to re-marry in a church with another spouse?

The union of two loving people, blessed by heaven, is considered eternal, because this is a special rite, a special church Sacrament. Therefore, before getting married in a church, young people need to think it over very well, this is a very responsible decision, because the church condemns divorce. Hence, in the Orthodox religion there is neither a church divorce nor a rite of debunking a church marriage. Nevertheless, despite disapproval, the Orthodox Church, in some circumstances, may be lenient towards “sinners” and agree to a second church wedding (about them below). Only in one case, church canons, without censure, allow re-associating with a sacred wedding with another chosen one - in the event of the death of the former spouse (wife), that is, widowers or widows.

To conduct a second wedding ceremony, a couple, after a regular marriage in the registry office, with a certificate in hand, must apply to the regional Diocesan Administration, since the priests are unable to repeat this without the consent of the Diocese (bishop), they do not have the appropriate authority. The address of this department can be found in any temple at the place of residence. But even in this case, the Diocesan administration issues a blessing for the re-execution of the church wedding ceremony, they do not issue any right to dissolve (dethrone) the church marriage. In addition to the marriage certificate, in order to apply to the diocesan office, you will need an identity card and a certificate of divorce from the previous spouse. In addition, there should be no canonical obstacles to the implementation of the ceremony. One spouse can apply, the presence of a couple is not required. When you have the permission of the Diocese for a second church marriage, you can go to any church and go through the wedding ceremony there a second time.

The procedure for re-marriage is somewhat different from the original. If the wedding is repeated by both spouses, then the ceremony is carried out in what is called the "second rank", that is, without the laying of crowns. In the case when only one of the spouses undergoes the ceremony again, then the ceremony is carried out according to all the rules. The rite of an Orthodox church wedding (marriage) cannot be performed more than three times.

Reasons for re-marriage.

A disease with leprosy, syphilis or AIDS.
Creation by one of the spouses of a new family (marriage).
Change of faith by one of the spouses (falling away from the Orthodox faith).
Incapacity for marital cohabitation, which arose before marriage, both intentionally and accidentally.
Intentional abandonment of a spouse or long-term unknown absence of one of the spouses.
Judgment for punishment.
Unnatural vices (sodomy, masturbation, bestiality).
An attempt on the life or health of a spouse or joint children.
Incurable mental or other illness (including drug addiction and alcoholism), medically certified.
Inability to procreate.
Wedding of relatives or canonical minors (15 years for men, 13 for women).
Marriage in the presence of a legal spouse.
Marriage against the will of one of the spouses.
Abortion by the spouse against the will of the spouse.
Dvorstvostvo or pimping.
Adultery (treason) of one of the spouses.

Reasons such as “didn’t agree with the spouse’s character”, “we don’t get along with relatives”, “the husband’s inability to financially provide for the family”, etc. are not sufficient to dissolve a church marriage.

According to Byzantine law, adultery was not a motive for dissolution of a marriage if both parties were guilty of it, if the spouses mutually forgave each other, or if the period for filing a complaint had expired (five years). The blessing of the bishop for the repeated conduct of the church ceremony will be received only by the spouse who is not involved and not guilty of adultery. Persons guilty of divorce will be able to undergo the ceremony again only after repentance and penance (pilgrimage, fasting, almsgiving, etc.). If this is the third case of marriage, the period of penance is increased based on canonical rules.

Consider the mistakes of the first marriage and do not make them in the second. Be patient, keep a sense of love and tenderness for each other, make compromises. Try to make your Christian family last forever.